Itachi’s head disappeared beneath the collar as well. “Stop that! That’s not yours!”
“I don’t wanna stop! It’s so yummy! And how do you keep it so firm, all wrapped up in this cloak?” More sucking sounds ensued. “Ahhh, perfect!”
“Quit scraping your teeth on it!”
“But I like the cream! Hey, it’s all wet.” Blowing sounds ensued.
“I didn’t know that Kaminari was so assertive,” Ayane said as she watched Itachi’s legs disappear into the cloak as well. They fell to the ground.
“Are they wrestling?” Naruto asked, confused as he watched arms and legs appearing and disappearing at random intervals, yelps and shrieks emitting from within.
“Wrestling for dominance,” Ayane told him. Two heads popped out of the collar, red and panting. “Well that was quick,” Ayane looked at Kisame, “Was that his first time?”
“How the hell would I know?!” Kisame demanded.
“Really, I thought you guys had regular sexual intercourse,” Ayane looked somewhat taken aback.
Kisame grabbed a hold of Samehada, growling angrily, thinking, must not kill her, must kill her, remember the treaty we need.
“That bad, huh?” Ayane decided. “A fish outta water? Flopping that badly? No wonder he needs Kaminari, you’re not good enough. And by the way, why do you need a big sword? Are you compensating for something?” Ayane curved her finger around her chin thoughtfully, oblivious to the fact to that she had insulted him. Screw the treaty! You little bitch! Kisame swung the Samehada at her, and Kakashi pulled her out of the way just in time. Ayane turned to Kakashi, hearts in her eyes, hands clasped. “You do love me!” Kakashi sweat dropped.
“Oh, my god.” Kisame was looking at Itachi and Kaminari.
“It’s okay, try not to be too jealous,” Ayane
“She took it! she took it, and I can’t get it back!” Itachi screamed.
“So it was his first time. There went my theory…. Unless it’s his first time with a woman.” Ayane said knowingly.
“Now, now, lets try not to make it worse. We don’t want them to kill you, and then us.” Kakashi chastised.
“There’s going to be an us?” The hearts returned to Ayane’s deep green eyes.
Kaminari and Itachi were staring lovingly at the box of pocky that was the source of all the trouble.
Everyone looked over at them when Kaminari narrowed her eyes. “What were you thinking we were doing, you sick perverts. It’s all about the pocky. And Ayane, quit flirting with Kisame. Are you getting that desperate?”
Ayane threw her arms around Kakashi. “It’s not true, Kakashi-sama! You are the only one for me!” Ayane tried to bring his head in for a kiss, and Kakashi struggled to stay away. “Hold still!”
“That’s pathetic,” Kaminari said. “But sooo damn hilarious.”
“You’re one to talk, fan girl.” Kimiko’s voice called out. She was still dragging Sasuke, and had changed clothes. She was now wearing a Jonin outfit. The Hokage was walking right next to her.
“No fair! How come she gets to be a ninja?” Ayane demanded. “She didn’t even want to come here in the first place!”
“These are the only clothes that loser boy here had that weren’t too… emo for my taste.” Kimiko told Ayane.
“Fan girl?” Kaminari twitched. “I’m not a fan girl,” she whined. She looked at Itachi with watery eyes. “I’m not a fan girl, am I, ‘tachi-kun?” She grabbed his shirt, before realizing that she was wrinkling the cloak. She retracted her arms, crossed them, stomping her foot down. She accidently kicked his knee. Itachi stared at her, emotionlessly. “I’m sorry,” she whimpered. His eyes turned into the Mangekyo Sharingan. A second later, Itachi’s eye was twitching. He saw Rianne. Kaminari’s sister. Kaminari started clawing at her eyes, and Kimiko and Ayane leapt at her to pull her away.
“I have a pretty good idea of what you’re doing,” Kimiko told Itachi firmly. “And I want you to stop. Some things just need to remain in the dark.”
“In the very, very, very dark.” Ayane finished.
Kaminari was curled in a ball whimpering, muttering, “She touched me. She touched me.”
“You broke her, now you fix her,” Kimiko tossed her friend at Itachi, who had slowly risen to his feet.
Ayane walked over to Kaminari, pulling out a doll. “Now show me on the doll where they touched you.”
“It’s unspeakable. Disgusting, dirty, vile.” Kaminari curled into Itachi’s arms, slipping back into his cloak. “Make it stop,” she whispered. Then she screamed. “No! make them stop! I don’t want to see this! My eyes, they burn!” More screaming. Itachi released the jutsu.
“What did you see?” Ayane whispered.
“Paula… and Rianne. Together.”
“Enough, you need not say more.” Ayane glared at Itachi. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done? She’s going to need therapy for the rest of her life! It’s like seeing Orochimaru and Kabuto!” She screamed. Ayane whirled to face the leader of the Akatsuki. “Give her a cloak as compensation! She might come back to normal.”
“Cloak?” Kaminari stopped sobbing, looking around. “For me?” She looked dazed.
“The human mind is a wonderful thing. It has a special way to deal with trauma. It can lock it away or discard the memory and replace it with a nicer one.” Everyone stared at Ayane. “What? I can be smart too!”
“I like Tachi-kun’s cloak. Can I have his? It’s warm and comfy.” Kaminari snuggled into his chest.
“See? I told you, you’re a fan girl! Oh, wait. Scratch that. I don’t want to have to be all nice later. You’re not a fan girl.” Kimiko finally noticed that she was still clutching Sasuke’s shirt. She released him, and he fell to the ground, face blue.
Tears filled kaminari’s eyes. “I’m not a fan girl.”
“Oh?” Ayane asked. “You’re not a fan girl? Exhibit A,” She pointed at Kaminari dramatically, “You’re curled in Itachi’s arms!”
“Oh, yeah? Well, Exhibit B: You’re holding hands with an unwilling Kakashi!” Kaminari snapped back.
“Exhibit C: I’ll kill you in your sleep!” Ayane screamed.
“Exhibit D: Let’s all just go home,” Kimiko deadpanned.
“Exhibit E: You’re the dumb bitch that dumped the microwave in the river! Now we can’t get any reception!” Kaminari yelled. Her hand flung out of the cloak, a finger pointed ominously at Kimiko.
“Exhibit F: The Hokage is here, so why don’t you just shut up and listen to what she has to say!”
“Exhibit H: Why are we speaking in Exhibits?” Kakashi asked.
[Reviews - 48]Chapter or Story
Table of Contents
- Text Size +
Chapter notes: What fun!