Hinata walked down the road towards Sakura's house, fidgeting. As she approached the building, Hinata began to shake. Come on, Hinata, you can do this she thought to herself unsteadily. Reaching out and knocking on the door, Hinata began to sweat. The door opened, revealing the pink-haired kunoichi. "Hey, Hinata! I see you made it over okay. Did you come prepared?"

Hinata nodded nervously. She looked at Sakura. "Y-yes, Sakura."

"Well, then, come on in?" Sakura said cheerfully, leading Hinata to her bedroom. Walking in, Hinata saw Tenten was already sitting on the floor. Looking up as Sakura and Hinata entered, she smiled.

"Hello, Hinata! Glad you were able to come!" Tenten said with a grin. The two had been friends for a while, and could thank Neji for that. Neji had been harrassing Hinata (yet again) one day when Tenten told him to stop. From that day on, the two had become good friends.

"S-so, who else is coming, S-Sakura?" Hinata asked, glancing around the room.

Sakura smiled. "Well, Ino is coming, and Temari from the sand village is too."

Hinata smiled. She had remembered when Sakura had invited her to this sleepover.

"Hey, Hinata!" Hinata turned to see a grinning Sakura running towards her.

"H-hello, Sakura," Hinata said, smiling nervously.

"Hey, Hinata, me and some friends are getting together at my place for the night, and I was wondering if you would like to come." Sakura said with a smile. Hinata looked around nervously.

"W-well, I mean, if its o-okay if I come, I mean, I w-wouldn't want to intrude," Hinata stuttered. Suddenly, there was a distraction that came in the form of a blonde-haired boy in an orange jumpsuit.

"Hey, Sakura-chan. Hey, Hinata-chan." Naruto said, wearing his signature fox-like grin. "What's going on?"

"Nothing!" Sakura said. Naruto raised an eyebrow.

"Sure doesn't seem like nothing," Naruto said with a smirk.

"Just go away!" Sakura yelled. Naruto sighed and walked away, looking rather hurt.

"M-maybe you shouldn't have yelled at him, Sakura," Hinata said, blushing slightly.

"I'm sorry, Hinata, but if I told him what was going on, he probably would have spyed on us or something." Sakura said, shrugging. "Well, can I count on seeing you tonight?"

Hinata nodded, and Sakura smiled. "Great! See you later, then."

Hinata was still a little upset about how Sakura had treated Naruto, but she knew that Sakura had good intentions.Well, Hinata thought to herself, opening the window to allow fresh air to enter the room, At least Naruto-kun won't be spying on us. Or so she thought.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Next to Sakura's bedroom window was a tree. Now, this was a perfectly normal tree, but it did make a good hiding spot. Of course, it was hard to spot ninja no matter where they were hiding. So, no one knew that Naruto was sitting in the branches of the tree with Sasuke, Shikamaru, Neji, and Yoro. Neji looked around and sighed.

"Tell me why we are doing this again?" Neji muttered scathingly, glaring daggers at Naruto.

Naruto grinned. "Well, we need to stop them from doing something horrible!"

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "And that horrible thing is?"

Naruto sighed. "Well, it'll be something like this...."

Sakura was lying on the bed, staring at the other girls. "Okay, I think we all know why we are here."

All the girls nodded, and began to strip off their clothes.....

Sasuke and Neji stared at Naruto. Shikamaru covered his face with his hand in order to hide a nosebleed. Yoro shook his head. "Naruto, you have a crazy imagination."

Naruto shrugged. "Hey, it could happen."

Yoro sighed. He had tried to drag Kiba and Choji along, but the two of them had been busy. Kiba had to take Akamaru to the vet while Choji was busy stocking up on "supplies" (coughFOODcough). Shino simply had not cared to come.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Soon, Ino and Temari had arrived, and the five girls sat sprawled around Sakura's room. Looking around at everyone, Sakura grinned. "Alright, what do you guys want to do first?"

Ino grinned, an evil glint in her eye. "I have an idea. Sakura, give me your phone."

Sakura raised an eyebrow, but decided not to question Ino any further. Handing Ino the phone, Ino dailed in the number she intended and waited.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Sasuke was starting to think about leaving when his cell phone rang (They have cell phones in this story. Who's the author here?). Everyone looked nervously at Sasuke. If any of the girls heard the ringing..... well, they were all as good as dead. Quickly, Sasuke answered his phone. "Hello?"

"Hi, Sasuke," came Ino's voice through the speaker. "I have something to tell you. I don't really love you, I actually love Sakura and I'm going to stop chasing you in order to give my full attention to her. Bye!" And with that, Ino promptly hung up.

A stunned silence met the group. Neji was staring at Sasuke. Shikamaru wasn't bothering to hide his nosebleed. A look of utmost horror was spreading across Yoro's face. Naruto, however, looked smug.

"Ha! I told you! But did you listen to me? No! Serves you right, Sasuke-teme!" Naruto raised his arms in victory when Neji hit him over the head.

"You Baka," Neji hissed. "Look at them!"

Looking at the group of girls, the boys saw that they were laughing. Hinata was giggling nervously. Everyone else was laughing histerically. Ino was the first one able to calm down enough in order to speak. "Do you think he bought it?" Ino asked, gasping for breath.

Sakura laughed. "Sasuke!? Definitely! He takes everything seriously! Well...... except Naruto, of course."

Sasuke stared at Ino, mouth gaping. "That was seriously not cool....." Sasuke was able to say eventually.

Ino looked around at everyone else. "So does anyone else want to have some fun?"

Temari grinned. "I'll go!"

Taking the phone, Temari dialed a number she knew all to well. After a moments pause, Temari heard a familiar voice grumble, "Hello?"

"Hey, Gaara," Temari said, grinning. "I have to ask you something..... If Kankuro started spying on me while I was in the bathroom, would you be mad?"

There was a pause, and then, "HAS HE BEEN DOING THAT!?" Temari had never heard Gaara mad before.

"Um, well......" Temari was nervous. SHe hadn't really planned on Gaara taking her seriously. Knowing Gaara, Temari had assumed that he would have just hung up.

"I'M GOING TO KICK HIS ASS!" Gaara yelled, hanging up the phone.

"OH NO!" Temari shouted, standing up, she looked around. "Excuse me, I have to go stop Gaara from killing Kankuro." Temari then promptly ran out of the room, with everyone laughing.

Outside, Temari was running towards her house when she heard laughing coming from the side of Sakura's house. Temari looked at the tree and saw a leg wearing orange pants hanging from the tree. Temari started to turn and go back into the house and tell everyone else, but decided against it. Let them have their fun, She thought, grinning. They'll pay for it later.....
-----------------------------------------------------------
TBC

Back inside the house, everyone else had calmed down. Now, Tenten was dialing a number into the phone. Tenten smirked as a voice said, "Hello?"

"Hi, Kiba!" Tenten said, trying to stop herself from laughing. "Listen, I have some bad news for you."

"What!?" Kiba asked nervously. Tenten grinned.

"Well, you see, Sakura just told me that a new disease has been discovered," Tenten said. "It is very deadly, especially to people who own dogs."

Kiba practically shrieked. "But I own a dog!"

Tenten smiled. "Don't worry, Sakura told me how to ward off the disease. All you have to do is remove all hair from both you and Akamaru, then cover both of your bodies in shaving cream. Now this next part is very important. You must then run through the streets of Konoha naked while yelling, 'Oodles of green noodles make blue poodles jump der stroodle'."

There was silence for a moment, and then, "All of my hair?"

Tenten grinned. "Yep! Now how about you get started on protecting yourself from that disease?"

Tenten placed the phone on the reciever and burst out laughing. Everyone else soon followed. Sakura calmed down and said, "Not bad, but it was only Kiba. To be honest, it isn't really too difficult to fool him."

Tenten shrugged. "Still funny though."

Sakura took the phone. Sakura dialed a number that she had been told to use only in case of an emergency. Soon, a familiar voice filled the room. "Hello?"

"Hello, Kakashi," said Sakura, speaking in a voice that sounded similar to that of Kurenai. "I was wondering..... could you maybe come down to my place and help me decide what to wear to my nudist meeting?"

Silence, and then, "But nudists don't wear anything."

"Exactly." Sakura grinned as everyone else began to shake with laughter.

"I'll be right over!" Kakashi practically yelled, hanging up the phone. Sakura and everyone else began to laugh. As soon as everyone calmed down, though, they stared at Hinata intently.

Hinata began to grow nervous. "W-what are you all s-staring at me for?" Hinata stuttered.

"We're waiting for you," Ino said with a sly grin. Hinata realized what she was getting at.

"B-but I've n-never p-prank called anyone before!" Hinata said shakily. Sakura smiled.

"Don't worry, we'll help you." Sakura picked up the phone. "Anyone in particular you want us to call?"

Hinata was quiet for a minute, then said, with a sly smile that no one had seen before, "I want you to call Rock Lee."

Sakura shrugged, and dialed Lee's number. She handed the phone to Hinata, who sat with the phone. Eventually, she heard Lee's voice. "Hello, and may the power of youth be with you!"

Hinata gathered all of her courage, and said, "This is Sakura. I just wanted to call and say that I love you."

Sakura looked mortified. Tenten and Ino, on the other hand, grinned at Hinata and gave her a thumbs-up. Her resolve strengthened, Hinata continued, "I find your eyebrows really sexy," (Sakura began to gag) "And your green leotard makes you look so handsome!" (At this points Sakura ran over to the wastepaper basket and vomited).

Lee's voice sounded throughout the room, "Sakura-chan! I always knew that you felt that way about me! Do you wish to go out on a date?"

Hinata gave Sakura an evil grin. "Sure thing, Lee. How about we meet up at my place tomorrow night at seven?"

"Agreed! I look forward to seeing you!" Lee shouted as he hung up the phone. Hinata burst out laughing along with Ino and Tenten. Sakura fumed.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Outside, the boys were watching this with horror.

"I never knew girls could be so..... evil!" Naruto said in an awed voice.

Neji snorted. "Well, they are girls. Of course they're evil." (That's right, folks: Neji is not only a cold bastard, but he is sexist too!)

Sasuke shivered. "The next time Ino asks me out, I'm not declining. I don't even want to think about what she'll do to me!"

Shikamaru just nodded, while Yoro was curled up in a ball visiting his happy place.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Back inside, Sakura had calmed down and had decided not to kill Hinata. The four had began to talk.

"So, then Lee did that thing he does with Gai-sensei," Tenten was saying, shuddering. "And then Neji just lost it. He began to yell at Gai about how a shinobi can't show emotion. And of course, when I tried to calm Neji down, he started yelling at me for being 'weak'." Tenten sighed sadly. "I might like him, but I still don't like it when he yells at me."

Sakura perked up. "What did you just say?" Sakura asked with a grin.

Tenten began to sweat. "Um, nothing!"

Sakura grinned even more. "You said you like Neji! Admit it! You love him!"

Tenten blushed. Then she said, "Alright, fine, I do. Will you promise not to tell him?"

Sakura smiled. "Of course!"
-----------------------------------------------------------
"Hey, Neji, are you okay?" Naruto asked, waving his hand in front of Neji's face. Neji was curled into a ball, his eyes wide with shock.

Yoro sighed. "Just leave him," He said. But inside, he was secretly cheering in victory. He finally had some dirt on Neji. No longer would Neji be able to push him around!

Shikamaru sighed. "Man, this is so troublesome. I think we should leave now before we get caught."

Neji seemed to wake up. He then began to climb down the tree.

"Hey, Neji, where are you going?" Naruto asked.

"I have to apologize to Tenten," Neji said, a distant look in his eye. "And.... and..... I have to tell her."

Shikamaru sighed. "Oh god, of all the people to get love sick, it had to be Neji."

Naruto grabbed Neji and pulled him back into the tree. "Listen, if you tell Tenten how you feel out of nowhere like that, she's going to be suspicious. She's going to ask questions, and then she'll find out we were spying on her and everyone else. So please, just keep your mouth shut, okay?"

Neji looked slightly pained, but he nodded. He then sat down and began to sulk.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Sakura turned to Hinata. "So, Hinata, is there anybody you like?"

Hinata blushed and shook her head. "N-no!"

Ino grinned. "Oh, I think your lying. Who is it?"

Hinata blushed even more, and said, "R-really, tthere isn't anyone I l-like!"

Sakura smiled. "It's Naruto, isn't it?"

Hinata froze. She looked at Sakura, speechless. She soon found her voice, and muttered, "H-how did you know?"

Sakura leaned forward. "Sorry, I didn't hear that. Can you speak a bit louder?"

Hinata raised her voice only slightly. "How did you know?"

Sakura leaned forward even further. "One more time, I still didn't catch that."

Hinata blushed, then more or less shouted, "How did you know!?"

Everyone was taken aback by Hinata's shouting. The Hyuuga heiress was usually rather quiet.

Hinata began to shake. "W-wil you p-please n-not tell N-Naruto-kun?"

Ino smiled. "Hey, if we promised not tell Neji about Tenten, then what makes you think we'll tell Naruto about you? Besides, to be honest, it was kinda obvious."

Hinata smiled.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Naruto was sitting next to Neji, now in his own state of shock. Sasuke was snickering while Shikamaru shook his head, muttering, "Women. How troublesome."

Naruto was having a long talk with Neji. "Man, life is complicated."

Neji nodded his head slowly. "Yeah."

Naruto sighed. "I wish this was one of those simple things you had to deal with on a day-to-day basis."

Neji nodded. "Yeah."

"Man, I am so stupid! How could I not have seen how Hinata felt about me?"

Neji nodded. "Yeah."

Naruto glared at Neji. "Are you even listening?"

Neji nodded. "Yeah."

Suddenly, a gust of wind brushed past the tree. No one seemed to pay it any mind.... that is, until the tree began to shake, causing all of the boys to land on the ground in a heap. Looking up, they saw Temari standing over them with a grin on her face. "Busted."

Temari marched the boys into the house, fingering her fan. Neij glared at Naruto. "This is all your fault, Uzamaki."

Naruto scowled. "Oh yeah, and why do I take the blame?"

Yoro clapped his hand to his forehead. "Because you were the one who dragged us into this mess in the first place, you fucking baka!"

Naruto stopped for a moment, then grinned sheepishly. "Oh yeah."

The six ninja shortly found themselves standing outside Sakura's bedroom door. Looking back with an evil grin on her face, Temari pushed open the door. "Hey, Sakura, we have guests!"

The girls looked up as Temari marched the boys into the room. Neji began to blush when he saw Tenten, Yoro was muttering to himself darkly, and Shikamaru..... was being Shikamaru. Sasuke looked at Ino as if she were going to attack him at any given moment (which, knowing Ino, was very likely to happen). Naruto's eyes darted around the room, looking for an escape route.

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "Why did you bring them here, Temari?"

Temari grinned. "Oh, I didn't bring them here. I found them sitting in the tree outside your window."

Sakura and Ino looked ready to kill. Tenten and Hinata, on the other hand, froze. Oh, crap, Tenten thought to herself. Neji didn't hear what I said about him, did he? Hinata merely fainted.

Sakura clenched her fists. "Naruto....."

Naruto began to curl up into a ball, but Temari jumped in between the jinchuuriki and the pink-haired girl.

"Hold on, I think I have a better idea of what to do with them...." Temari walked up to Sakura and whispered something into her ear. Sakura looked thoughtful for a minute, then grinned.

"Yeah, that sounds like a good idea...." Sakura turned to the boys. "Alright, now I'm going to tie you up with these ropes, and..... not in that sense, you perverts!" Sakura shouted as the boys began to turn red.

Tenten supplied the rope, and as soon as the boys were tied up, they were placed in a circle with the girls. Temari was able to wake Hinata up, but Hinata was still looking at Naruto nervously.

"All right, what we're going to do is play a little truth or dare," Sakura said with a grin. "Now, you can dare the other person to do anything, but there are a few restrictions: First, nothing that involves any kind of sexual contact. Second, nothing that involves the group of you going free. Alright, if that's everything, then-"

Sakura was stopped by a voice yelling, "Oodles of green noodles make blue poodles jump der stroodle!"

Everyone was quiet for a moment. Then, Tenten broke the silence. "My finest free verse."

Sakura shrugged. "Whatever. Now, if that's everything, let's get started. I'll go first." And without further ado, Sakura reached for the bottle and spun it.

The bottle's gaze circled the room, its open face pointing at everyone in turn. (1) Then, eventually, it stopped and landed on Sasuke. "Oh, hell," Sasuke muttered with a sigh.

Sakura smiled. "Alright Sasuke, truth or dare?"

"Dare," Sasuke muttered without taking time to think. Sakura gave him an evil grin.

"Alright, I dare you to strip down to your underwear." Sakura said, placing her hands on her hips. Sasuke looked at the ropes binding him.

"I can't, I'm tied up." Sakura looked thoughtful, then smiled.

"Hey, Ino, how about you undress Sasuke?" Sakura said, turning to the blonde. Ino turned red and moved towards Sasuke, shaking.

"Please don't kill me for this," Ino muttered to Sasuke as she pulled of his shirt and pants. Soon, the Uchiha was sitting on the floor, not only tied up, but wearing only his bowers.

Naruto snorted. "Wow, Sasuke, I never knew you wore Pokemon boxers!" Naruto gloated.(2)

Sasuke glared daggers at the jinchuuriki. "Shut the fuck up, dobe."

Sasuke extended his leg and used it to spin the bottle. The bottle twirled, landing on Hinata. "Um..." Sasuke was hesitant. The Hyuuga heir hadn't really ever done anything mean to him. In fact, she generally avoided him. "Hinata, truth or dare?"

Hinata looked scared. "Um...uh.... d-dare?"

Sasuke smirked. "Alright. I dare you to kiss Naruto.... on the lips."

No one was quite sure just how many shades of red there were, but they were pretty sure that Hinata was turning every shade of red. Naruto also went red. He saw Sasuke smirking at him out of the corner of his eye.

Sasuke smiled. Don't look so nervous, dobe, The Uchiha thought to himself. I'm actually doing you a favor.

Hinata was now so red that no one would have been surprised if steam had begun to pour from her ears. The Hyuuga heir leaned forward. She faced Naruto. Slowly, she began to inch closer and closer to Naruto until......

Will Hinata kiss Naruto? Will the boys be able to escape? Why is Sasuke wearing Pokemon boxers? And is Kiba really that much of an idiot? All of these questions shall be answered in the next chapter... of DOOM! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
========================

(1) Is that a great line of bullshit or what?

(2) A cookie to whoever saw that one coming.

========================

Note: The story will not be updated again until I recieve 12 or more reviews on this story. I'm trying to get people into the habit of reviewing more.

All Hinata saw was blackness. She had held her eyes closed for several moments, not knowing whether it was safe to open them or not. She cracked one eye open and saw that her lips were pressed against Naruto's.

And then she died.

No, not really. But it did seem like that. Hinata turned completely red and fainted, her lips still locked with Naruto's. Everyone clapped, save for Shikamaru and Sasuke, who merely clapped their feet together. Yoro, Naruto, and Neji sat still, none of them saying a word. Naruto was glowing a violent shade of red, while Yoro and Neji were glaring at the jinchuuriki.

"Naruto," Yoro said, his voice shaking with rage. "If you hurt Hinata, I will kill you. I don't want to see my sister get hurt, even if she is adopted."

Neji's face was doing the talking for him. He was glaring at Naruto with pure spite. As he did this, the following phrase appeared beneath Neji's face:

THE HYUUGA DEATH GLARE IS PROPERTY OF THE HYUUGA CLAN. NO ONE OUTSIDE OF THE HYUUGA CLAN MAY USE IT. ANYONE WHO BREAKS THIS RULE WILL BE SUBJECTED TO TORTURE MOST FOUL. SAID TORTURE WILL LEAVE SUBJECT CRYING, SUCKING THEIR THUMB, AND CAUSE THEM TO WET THEIR BED FOR THE NEXT SEVERAL YEARS. THIS MESSAGE HAS BEEN BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE ADMINISTRATION FOR TORTURE AWARENESS

Neji looked down and raised an eyebrow at the text. "What the hell is that!?"

Yoro shrugged. "Beats me. Just ignore it."

Sakura cleared her throat, causing everyone to return to attention. Naruto had fainted by now, and was lying on top of Hinata (Much to the anger of Yoro and Neji).

"Alright people, time for our next dare! Sasuke and Hinata have already gone, so now I'll just spin for Hinata." And with that, Sakura once more reached into the center of the circle and twirled the bottle. The bottle spun around, until it landed on.....

BARNEY THE DINOSAUR!

Just kidding. It really landed on Neji. Sakura clapped her hands together. Perfect, the pink-haired girl thought to herself. If he picks dare, I'll dare him to tell Tenten how he really feels about her. If he says truth, I'll ask him if he likes Tenten. This is perfect!

For the first time in his life, Neji's brain just stopped. He couldn't figure out what to pick. What would he do? Summoning his courage, he said, "Actually, I have something I want to ask Tenten."

Now it was Tenten's turn to turn red. She sat still, not daring to breathe. What was Neji going to say?

The Hyuuga prodigy swallowed, and said, in a perfect imitation of Hinata, "D-do you r-really like me?"

Tenten blushed even further, and nodded. Neji swallowed again, and, mustering what remained of his courage, asked, "And, y-you wouldn't mind going out on a d-d-d-date later tonight, would y-you?"

Tenten turned an even darker shade of red (man, there sure is a lot of blushing in this chapter, isn't there?). She began to shake slightly, but was able to say, "Y-yes."

The Hyuuga prodigy gave a shaky smile. On the inside, however, he was doing the Neji Victory Dance, which was like a combination of the Numa Numa Dance and the Chicken Dance (If you can imagine that). Tenten returned the smile, and looked at the ground. "Um, Sakura, can we skip Neji's turn and just let him leave?"

Sakura frowned, looking at Tenten. Sakura sighed and said, "Sure, why not."

Tenten jumped up and ran to Neji, where she untied him. Neji was about to leave the room when Sakura shouted, "Hey, Neji, can you spin the bottle before you go?"

Neji shrugged, reaching down and spinning the bottle. The bottle landed on Ino, who looked really scared at this predicament. Neji then turned to the door, but just as he reached the doorway, he turned around and said, "Tenten, do you want to go on our date or not?"

Tenten squealed and jumped up, running to Neji's side. The two then left the room together. Sakura looked at the now smaller group. Naruto and Hinata had yet to wake up, Sasuke was sitting around in his Pokemon boxers, Temari was stroking her fan, Yoro was playing rock-paper-scissors with an abyss clone [1], Shikamaru was yawning, and Ino was shaking in fear.

Sakura smiled politely at Ino and said, "Truth or dare?"

Ino, without taking time to act like a logical being and think things over, shrieked, "DARE!"

Suddenly, the doors burst open, and Shino came marching in with a microphone. He flipped on the switch and began to sing;

It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's DARE

It's DARE

You've got to press it on you
You just think it
That's what you do, baby
Hold it down, DARE

Jump with them all and move it
Jump back and forth
And feel like you were there yourself
Work it out

Never did no harm
Never did no harm

It's DARE
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's DARE

It's DARE

You've got to press it on you
You just, think it, that's what you do
That's what you do, baby
Hold it down, DARE

Jump with them all and move it
Jump back and forth
And feel like you were there yourself
Work it out

Never did no harm
Never did no harm

It's DARE
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's DARE

Never did no harm
Never did no harm

It's DARE
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's coming up
It's DARE

You've got to press it on you
You just, think it, that's what you do
That's what you do, baby
Hold it down, DARE

Jump with them all and move it
Jump back and forth
And feel like you were there yourself
Work it out

You've got to press it on you
You just, think it, that's what you do
That's what you do, baby
Hold it down, DARE

Jump with them all and move it
Jump back and forth
And feel like you were there yourself
Work it out[2]

Shino stopped singing and pulled out a tin can, looking at everyone expectantly. Everyone shrugged and tipped some money into the tin. Shino nodded to everyone and left the room, leaving a stunned silence in the room..... again.

Shikamaru twitched. "Well, that was troublesome." Everyone who was still awake and in the room nodded. No one had ever expected Shino to come barging into the room and start singing, "DARE".

Sakura shrugged and turned to Ino. "Alright, Ino, I dare you to make out with Sasuke."

Ino turned red, while Sasuke began to twitch uncontrollably. Now THIS was going way too far. Ino looked at Sasuke turning even redder, and cralwed closer.

Sasuke was really freaked out now. "Okay, Yamanaka, I know that Sakura dared you to do this, but it doesn't mean you have t-"

The Uchiha was cut off by Ino's tongue pushing into his mouth. Sasuke was about to pull away, when he thought, Hey, this isn't so bad. I guess I can deal with this.

Forty Minutes Later

Everyone in the room was looking at the tangled mass that was Ino and Sasuke. Ino had managed to remove the ropes that were binding Sasuke, and now the two were rolling around on the floor in a full-blown make-out session. Hinata had come to during this time and, upon seeing Ino and Sasuke grasping each other and moaning, fainted yet again. Naruto, on the other hand, was still out cold.

"Um, guys," Sakura said, her eye twitching. "I think you've been at it for long enough now." When the two didn't reply, Sakura frowned and picked up Hinata. "Alright, everyone, let's give these two some privacy."

Temari reached over and untied The remaining boys, who quickly picked up Naruto and ran out of the room. Shikamaru stopped outside the front door.

"That was way too troublesome," He said, shaking. "You'll never see me like that around a woman."

Suddenly, Temari came pushing past Shikamaru, and angry look on her face. "Out of my way, loser."

Shikamaru frowned. "Was it something I said?"

Yoro grinned. "I think she likes you. When you said you wouldn't ever act like that around a woman, I think you hurt her feelings slightly."

Shikamaru sighed. "How troublesome. I guess I'd better go talk to her." And without further ado, the boy genius left the hall in search of Temari.

Yoro frowned and looked at Naruto, who was propped against the wall next to Hinata. "Oh, sure, leave me alone with Fox-boy and his stalker!"[3]

"Why would you call Naruto that?" Sakura asked, walking into the hall. Yoro began to sweat.

"Oh, no reason." Yoro said quickly, glancing at the ground. "So, it looks like everyone got together."

Sakura laughed shakily. "Yeah, I guess so."

Yoro laughed nervously. "Sorry about the whole spying on you thing. It was really Naruto's idea."

"I figured as much. What did he think we were having some sort of lesbian orgy or something?"

Yoro's sweating became even more violent. "As a matter of fact, he did. But you know Naruto, he has an insane imagination."

Sakura laughed. "Yeah, that's Naruto for you." She smiled at Yoro and looked at the ground. "Well, I'd better go make sure Sasuke and Ino aren't going a little too far in my room."

Yoro stepped forward. "I'll go with you. You shouldn't have to face something so terrifying on your own."

Sakura laughed. "Alright, but don't blame me if you are mentally scarred for life."

The two walked down the hall and opened the door to Sakura's bedroom. Inside, they saw Sasuke and Ino on the floor, talking to each other in low voices. Ino looked up as the two entered. "Oh, hey. Sorry if we scared you off or anything."

Sakura grinned. "It's not a problem. I'll just give you two a bit more alone time."

Sakura turned around and began to walk away, but had forgotten that Yoro was standing behind her. Before she knew what had happened, Sakura found herself staring into Yoro's gray eyes with her green ones. The two quickly pulled away form each other, blushing and stammering apologies.

"I'm sorry, it's my fault...
"No, I should have watched where I was going..."

The two went on like that for a while. Sasuke and Ino looked at each other and smirked.

Yoro looked down at the ground. "Hey, look at the time. I'd better get going. See you later Sakura!"

With that, Yoro quickly turned around and bolted out of the house. Sakura remained rooted to where she was, not moving. That was.... I never..... Wow, Sakura thought to herself.
--------------------------------------

Hinata opened her eyes slowly. What just happened? She thought blearily. Why am I in the hallway, and what happened to....

"Naruto-kun!" Hinata squeaked, and she looked at the blonde-haired boy lying next to her, his eyes wide open.

"Um, hi, Hinata," Naruto said, a small smile on his face. "Did you sleep okay?"

Hinata nodded, her face turning red as she thought back on the moment she had shared with her crush just earlier. "Y-yes, Naruto-kun. How are you doing?"

"Fine," Naruto stated, looking at the ground. It was really unusual for him to be so quiet. Naruto glanced at Hinata, his face tinged red. "So, uh, Hinata, Do you really like me?"

Hinata blushed even further and nodded. "Y-yes. I have for a long time now, ever since the academy. I-I never really thought that s-someone as nice as you would be interested in someone as q-quiet as me."

Hinata closed her eyes, thinking that Naruto would probably think she was a coward now. Suddenly, she felt something pressing against her from the side. Opening her eyes, Hinata saw Naruto embracing her.

"Hinata, you baka," Naruto whispered to her. "Did you really think I cared about that? To be honest, that's actually why I liked you back then, too."

Hinata froze. Did Naruto-kun just say what I thought he said?

Looking into Naruto's eyes, Hinata saw that he had meant every word of what he had said. Smiling, Hinata hugged him in return. "Naruto-kun, thank you for accepting me."

"No, Hinata, thank you for accepting me. When everyone else treated me like trash, you were the only one who showed me kindness. Thank you."

The two sat like that for a long time, until they heard Sakura yell, "Alright, you two! Take it outside!"
--------------------------------------

Temari sat in a bench in the middle of Konoha Park, sniffling. She had heard it with her own ears. She had always heard Ino and Chouji talking about it before, but had never really believed them until now. Now she knew it was true: Shikamaru didn't give a damn about any woman.

Well, Temari thought scathingly. Maybe I should be a jerk to him too! Temari was about to get up, when she saw the shinobi she was just thinking about walking towards her.

Temari glared at PineappleHead[4]. "What do you want?" She growled.

Shikamaru sighed. This is going to be such a drag.....

The shadow user gestured to the seat next to Temari. "May I?"

Temari shrugged, which Shikamaru took as a yes. Sitting down, Shikamaru looked at the sand kunoichi. "Hey, I'm sorry about what I said back there. I was just in a bad mood."

Temari snorted. "Yeah, right."

Shikamaru frowned. "No, really, I guess watching Sasuke and Ino made me a little..... jealous."

Temari raised an eyebrow. "You're joking me, right?"

Shikamaru blushed a bit. "No, I'm not. You see, there's something I've been wanting to tell you for a while now..... When we first met, I only really saw you as an opponent I had to fight. But, after that, I kind of opened my eyes a bit."

Shikamaru sighed. "I guess what I'm trying to say is.... I love you."

Temari froze. She looked at Shikamaru. Was this some kind of joke. But if it is, Temari thought, It's a damn good one.

Shikamaru went on. "I think you like me too. I kind of guessed that from your reaction to what I said."

Temari blushed. "And what if I do?"

Shikamaru looked at Temari and smiled. "Do you really have to be so troublesome?"

Anyone who would have passed by at that time would have been shocked to see the normally lazy Nara boy making out with the kunoichi from the Sand village.

--------------------------------------

Kankuro was sitting on the couch, watching television when he heard the door behind him open. Turning around, Kankuro saw Gaara picking up his gourd and heading out the door.

"Where ya going?" Kankuro asked conversationally. Gaara turned to the puppeteer and glared.

"I've got some business to attend to with a boy in Konoha. I'll be out for a few days." Gaara then turned and left the room, vanishing into the sand outside. Kankuro shrugged and turned back to his soaps.

"Whatever, it's not like we have anything better to do around here without Temari. I miss putting Gaara's sand in her panties."

What is Gaara going to do in Konoha? How are the relationships going to go? Why the hell did Shino start singing "DARE"? The answers to these questions in later chapters!
--------------------------------------

1. Don't ask me how he did it without the ability to perform seals, even I don't even know.... and I'm the author!

2. Ten cool points to whoever can name the music group who came up with this song.

3. I like Hinata, but she is still a stalker. There's proof in one of the episodes that spans out over Naruto's fight with Kiba, I'm just not sure which one.

4. My nickname for Shikamaru XD
--------------------------------------

Wow, that was a long chappie. I'm not updating again until I get thirty reviews. And so you know, I'm only counting one review per person. That means that even if you post forty reviews, I'll only count it as one. Your review will only be counted once per update. (That means that every time the story is updated, reviewing once more will still be counted.)

The above is confusing, ne?

New Text Key:

Inner Thoughts

"Speech"

Kurayami/Kyuubi/Shukaku thoughts

Hiashi gave a large yawn. He had just woken up from a long slumber. The night before, Kakashi had taken him out for drinks with Asuma and Gekko. Needless to say, the four had gotten completely hammered. Hiashi went out and got his mail. He was flipping through the letters when he came across a letter from Kakashi. Funny, Kakashi never sends anyone letters.

Hiashi shrugged and put the letter aside, walking into the kitchen. No sooner had he walked into the room than he stopped..... dead. Sitting at the table was Uzamaki Naruto.

"Damn, I must be more hammered than I thought," Hiashi muttered.

"Hi, Hiashi-sama!" Naruto said, grinning. Hiashi blinked and shook his head. No, this was the real thing.

"Uzamaki!" Hiashi yelled, pointing dramatically at the demon container. "What the hell are you doing in my house? I thought you moved in with Yoro-san!?"

Naruto grinned sheepishly. "Oh, yeah, funny story about that actually....."

Naruto, however, was cut off by a voice saying, "G-good morning, N-Naruto-kun. Did you s-sleep well?"

Hinata walked into the room, smiling. The smile vanished, though, when she saw Hiashi. Hiashi looked at Naruto, a look of hate on his face.

"Uzamaki......" Hiashi growled, activating his Byakugan. Naruto backed up to the wall.

"Hold on, this isn't what you think Hiashi-sama!" Naruto yelped, looking around for an exit.

"No? You mean you didn't deflower my daughter!?" Hiashi shrieked, entering Jyuuken stance.

Naruto tried to smile encouragingly. "We only snuggled...."

"Prepare yourself for battle!" Hiashi screamed, rushing at Naruto.

"Run, Naruto-kun!" Hinata yelled, grabbing Naruto's arm and dragging him out of the complex, closely followed by a fuming Hiashi.

~*~

Yoro lay on his bed, staring intently at the ceiling. Okay, let's review. Last night, Sakura and I kissed..... by accident. Does this mean anything? No...... maybe...... yes.....

Having trouble, Yoro-san?

Oh, hey Kurayami. I'm just thinking.

About a girl?

How did you...... Have you been looking at my memories again?

Perhaps..... After all, reading does get dull every now and again.

Whatever...... So, what do you think?

About Sakura-san? Well, if you ask me, she seems like a nice girl, even if she can be..... abusive.

Amen.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. Yoro sighed and got up. He walked to the entrance hall and opened the front door.

Naruto and Hinata came bursting into the room, panting. Naruto gave Yoro a scared look. "Quick! Lock the door!"

Yoro raised an eyebrow, staring at the two. "Naruto, what-"

"Just close the damn door, niisan!" Hinata yelled, shocking both of the male shinobi.

"Fine, fine. Just tell me why I should and I'll be happy to comply." Yoro crossed his arms and glanced out the door. He blinked and shook his head. "Damn, I must be more hammered than I thought."[1]

Running down the road was the head of the Hyuuga clan, Hyuuga Hiashi. He was running towards the Gekido Manor, his Byakugan active. "Uzamaki! Come back here with my daughter!"

Yoro sighed and slammed the door, locking it. "so I assume that's Hiashi no Danna had found out about you two?"

Both of them nodded. Naruto turned to Hinata. "Hinata-chan, isn't there anyway we can get rid of Hiashi-sama?"

Hinata frowned. "I-I can't think anything, Naruto-kun."

Yoro sighed. "I'm going to go take a look around the Hyuuga compound. You two hide out here for the time being. I'm going to go see if I can find anything to blackmail Danna with."

Naruto blinked. "What makes you so sure you'll find something?"

Yoro laughed. "Please. Danna is a human being. All human beings have something that can be used as blackmail against them, like how Hinata has that picture of you that she-"

Due to the graphic nature of the following sentence given by Yoro-san, the FCC has decided to block the following message for the time being. We will return to the following scene ina moment.

........

.......

......

......

Alright, let's go back now.

"-And this the real fun part, Hinata takes the-"

Oops, too soon.

........

........

.....

Alright, looks like its over now.

"-And that is why Hinata always blushes when she you're around." Yoro concluded, grinning.

Naruto's nose was bleeding, while Hinata had turned completely scarlet. Outside, Hiashi was sitting with his back to the door. "So THAT'S what she does in her room for all those hours."

Yoro shrugged. "Alright, I'm off now. See ya later!"
~*~

Yoro was in hysterics. He had spent the last three hours scouring the Hyuuga complex, and he STILL hand't found anything to blackmail Hiashi with [2]. Sighing heavily, Yoro sat down at the kitchen table.

"Great, Naruto is going to die and I can't do anything about it." Yoro gave another sigh when something on the table caught his eye. It was Kakashi's letter. Picking it up, Yoro opened it and read the note inside.

Dear Yoro-san,

Yes, I know that I sent this to Hiashi, but it is really meant for you. See, I knew that you would look for something to blackmail Hiashi with so that Naruto could stay alive and be with Hinata. Yes, I know all about that. I'm psychic! Anyway, I think you may find the other contents of this letter rather useful.

Yours truly,
Kakashi-Sensei

Yoro blinked and dumped out the rest of the letters contents. Several pictures fell out. Yoro picked one up. His eyes widened. "Oh my god, this is....."
~*~

"The doors won't hold for much longer. Naruto-kun!" Hinata yelled, placing more furniture in front of the door. In the past hour, Hiashi has somehow managed to procure a battering ram, and was now running at the door full force.

"Yoro ditched us!" Naruto growled, cracking his knuckles. "When I see him again, I am so going to kill him!"

"Perhaps you should be worrying more about yourself rather than Yoro-san." A voice behind Naruto made him jump. Turning around, Naruto saw Hiashi standing there.

"No," Naruto said, his eyes wide. "How did you get in here?"

Hiashi grinned and opened his mouth to speak, but then closed it again. "Now that you mention it, I have absolutely no idea!"

Hiashi shrugged, then activated his Byakugan. "Now, time to die! For you, that is!"

"Stop right there, Danna!" A voice shouted. The door burst open, and Yoro came running into the room. "If you lay a single hand on him, I'll show everyone in Konoha these!"

Yoro pulled out a picture and waved it in Hiashi's face, grinning. Hishia frowned and took the picture. His face quickly changed from red to white.

"W-Where did you get this!?" Hiashi demanded, staring at Yoro.

"From a friend," Yoro said, grinning. "Now then, if you don't want that getting out to all of Konoha, then you'll leave Naruto alone!"

Hiashi glared at Yoro, but his expression softened when he saw the determined look on Yoro's face.

"Fine, I know when I'm beaten. Alright, although I don't like it, Naruto-san can be with my daughter.... but if I catch wind that he has done anything dishonorable......" Hiashi let the sentence hang, letting everyone know what he meant. then without further ado, he pulled out an umbrella and floated away to Banks household, singing, "Oh, just a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down......"

Yoro frowned. "Is it me, or has Danna gone completely nutso?"

Naruto picked up the photo that Hiashi dropped. After a moments silence, he passed the photo to Hinata, muttering, "Damn, I must be more hammered than I thought."

Hinata glanced at the picture. It showed Hiashi wearing a dress and making out with Hyuuga Datenshi [3]. Hinata frowned.

"Damn, I must be more hammered than I thought."
~*~

[1] Yes, Yoro-san is an alcholic. How else do you think he puts up with Naruto?

[2] Although he did find some interesting stories that Hiashi wrote. Something about a spiky-haired idiot running around with a bunch of otehr shinobi. It seemed like pure garbage to Yoro.

[3] Another OC who has yet to be introduced in any of my stories. Look forward to him, or else!
~*~

And there you go. That should tide you over until my next update. My next review goal is fifty reviews! So, be a supporter of R&R!

Next Time: Gaara arrives in Konoha, what happened on Neji and Tenten's date, and the shocking secret of Rock Lee!

The wind was blowing past the gates of Konoha. All was silent.

...

Okay, it actually wasn't.

Why?

Because I said so.

Gekko was leaning against the wall to keep his balance as he coughed at an incredible volume. Man, this is boring, Gekko mused, continuing to cough. I wish something interesting would happen.

Suddenly, a tornado of sand appeared in front of Gekko. Gekko raised his arms to prevent the sand from getting into his eyes. When he lowered them, he saw Sabaku no Gaara standing in front of him.

"What (cough) are (cough) you (cough) doing (cough) here (cough) in (cough) Konoha?" Gekko wheezed. Gaara glanced at him and raised his arm.

~*~

"Oh my god, Neji, look at that!" Tenten shouted, pointing at the nearest coffee shop. Sitting out front were Sakura and Rock Lee, who seemed to be deep in conversation.

"Hn," Neji replied. "So, do you think Lee's getting ready to tell her, then?"

Tenten nodded. "Yeah, I think so. How about we go over there and give him so moral support?"

Neji raised an eyebrow. "Um, Tenten, I don't think we should intrude-" But before he could get any further, Tenten grabbed him by the arm and dragged him over to Lee and Sakura.

"Hey, Lee!" Tenten said, grinning. Lee and Sakura both looked up. Lee was smiling slightly.

"Ohayo, Tenten-san. What are you doing here?" Lee asked, smiling.

Tenten smiled. "Oh, you know, just, hanging around."

Lee nodded and looked at Sakura. "Um, Sakura-san, there is a reason I asked you to come here today. I want to tell you that I-"

Lee stopped. The reason he had stopped speaking was because Tenten had pulled out a massive banner that read, "YOU GO, LEE!"

But, that wasn't the worst of it. Tenten had whipped out a pair of pompoms and was waving them in the air, dancing with a massive grin on her face. Now, this wouldn't have been too bad if she hadn't dressed Neji in a mini-skirt and had him dance along with her.

Lee's eye twitched. "Um, Tenten-san, Neji-san, I would prefer some privacy while I speak with Sakura-san."

Tenten frowned. Neji, however, looked hopeful. "See, Tenten? Lee wants us to go away. How about we go up to the Hokage monument?"

Tenten glared at Neji and was about to speak, but was stopped when Sakura turned around and spoke. "Actually, before you leave, can you tell me what happened on your date? I've been a bit curious."

Tenten beamed. Neji and Lee, on the other hand, looked crestfallen.

"Oh, god, I knew this was going to happen, I was just hoping that I wouldn't be around for it to happen," Neji muttered to Lee, frowning.

Tenten smiled as she began her tale. "Well, it all began when...."

BEGIN THE FLASHBACK!

....

WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T FIND THE REELS?

....

DAMN IT, LET ME TAKE A LOOK!

....

HOW COULD YOU NOT SPOT IT THERE!? ALRIGHT, BEGIN THE FLASHBACK!

Tenten and Neji were walking down the street, Tenten wrapped around Neji's arm. Both were blushing furiously. Neji looked down at Tenten and swallowed.

"So, um, Tenten, w-what do you want t-to do first?" He stammered, looking at the kunoichi.

Tenten smiled. "Well....."

"Oh god no, don't tell them that, Tenten!" Neji shouted, but too late. Why was he too late? Becuase it's my story! Fear my mighty author powers! MWAHAHAHA!

Neji's eye twitched as he looked at the children sitting on the floor. Reading a story to academy students? What kind of thing was that to do on a date? Well, believe it or not, Tenten had planned this to see how good with kids Neji was.

Neji inhaled and grabbed a book. "Alright, let's see... Once upon a time, there were three little shinobi who lived in a forest. The Kyuubi went and killed them all. The end."

The children all stared at Neji. Several of them started to cry. Neji sighed.

"Alright, fine, I'll tell you a better story. Once, there was a little family of birds. The birds were the most beautiful in all of there village, but they were also very protective. So, they took a group of the birds and made them into slaves, so that the slave birds could protect the other birds. The other birds had complete control over the slave birds, and the slave birds were all sad.

"Then one day, one of the slave birds gathered all the other slave birds and they all rioted. Then, they overthrew the other birds and THEY became the masters! The Main House were really sad then, oh yes, they were very sad, especially when Neji grabbed a kunai and slit open Hiashi's throat and-"

The children's eyes had all gone wide before Tenten decided to step in. She whipped out a club and smashed Neji over the head. Then she turned to the children.

"Okay, kids, story time is over."

Lee was rolling around on the floor laughing. Sakura was giggling while Tenten smiled warmly at Neji. Neji's eye twitched.

"Hold on, it gets better." Tenten said, smiling.

After the academy fiasco, Tenten decided to take Neji to the carnival. After all, what could go wrong at the carnival?

More than you know, more than you know.

"Hey, Neji, let's go there first!" Tenten said, pointing at the house of mirrors.

Neji shrugged, and followed Tenten to the building. As soon as thery entered, the door behind them sealed up.

"In order to escape, you must find your way through the maze," a feminine voice said. "Trust not your eyes, and- Wait a minute, Tenten?"

Tenten froze, and glanced at Neji. "Neji, use your Byakugan to get us out of here, now!"

"Tenten, what's the big deal? That person sounds like they want to talk to you." Neji replied, raising an eyebrow.

"Just shut the fuck up and get us out of here!" Tenten shrieked as a boy in a blue kimono appeared out of nowhere.

"Tenten, its me, Haku!" The boy said, pulling off his mask.

Tenten forced a smile. "Oh, um, hi, Haku. How's it going?"

Haku smiled. "Not bad. Who's your friend?"

Tenten looked rather nervous. "Oh, um, this is Neji."

Neji raised an eyebrow. "How do you know Tenten?"

Haku smiled. "She's my ex-girlfriend."

Neji shrugged. "Oh, I thought that it was something serious hubbajawhat?" Neji's personality went swiftly from uncaring to shocked.

Haku frowned. "Who are you?"

Neji, however, had frozen. Then, out of nowhere, he screamed, "You are within my field of divination! Prepare yourself!!!"

Neji then ran into Haku and palmed him into the air, creating a large hole in the roof. Neji grabbed Tenten and jumped out, running to the Hyuuga compound.

"And that's what happened," Tenten said, smiling. "Of course, Neji and I had a little talk when we returned to the Hyuuga compound. You should have seen his face when I told him all about Haku!"

Lee laughed, while Sakura frowned. "Whatever happened to Haku, anyway?"

~*~

Gaara stared at the person lying on the ground. Was it a boy, or a girl? Or, was it both? Oh well, better put them out of their misery, Gaara thought, raising his arms.

~*~

Sakura turned to Lee. "So, Lee, what was it you wanted to tell me?"

Lee looked at the ground. "Well, I'm not quite sure how to put this..."

Sakura smiled. "Oh, just say it."

Lee nodded. "Alright then, I will. Sakura-san, I'm gay."

~*~

Yay! Plot twist! Tune in next chapter to see what happens! If you want it, then give me 70 reviews!

Next time: Gaara's purpose in Konoha, and Sasuke's obsessions!

Sakura sat still for a minute, her face not conveying emotion. And then....

Sakura hit Lee on the head. "Baka! Why didn't you tell me before!? And why have you been going out with me, then!?"

Lee's eyes shone with tears as he spoke. "Sakura-san, I have an explanation. First, I was unsure as to how you would react, and second, I didn't want to spring it upon you out of nowhere! What would you have done if I had just walked up to you on the street and said, 'Sakura-san, I'm gay!'"

Sakura stood still for a moment, then gave Lee a hug. "Sorry, I guess the news took me by surprise, that's all."

Neji put a hand on Lee's shoulder. "If it helps, it was actually really obvious."

Tenten glared at the Hyuuga prodigy. "Oh yeah, cause that's really going to help, Neji!"

Lee smiled. "No, it's alright, Tenten. I just want to say that I am overjoyed that you still like me!"

Neji frowned. Actually, he never really liked Lee to begin with, but he didn't really like him any less now.

"I'll go find Ino," Sakura said, smiling at Lee. "She'll probably know someone we can set you up with!"

Lee reached towards Sakura as she walked off. "No, Sakura, wait! I want to find someone on my own!"

~*~

Little did Sakura know that Ino was busy at the moment. Sasuke and Ino had been going out for a week now, and everything was going fine. that is, until Ino went to watch a movie at Sasuke's house.

"Why not?" Sasuke whined, holding up a bunch of hair ties.

"Because, I'll look like a dork!" Ino growled, glaring at the Uchiha.

Sasuke's eyes filled with tears. "But it'll make me happy! And you want me to be happy, right?"

Ino groaned. "But everything is not about you, Sasuke-kun. Do you think I want to dress up like Pikachu?"

Now, before we delve further, I think it is best to decribe Sasuke's house. The walls were lined with poke-ball wallpaper. He had Pikachu bedsheets, and he had a Charizard dresser. There was also an Absol rug (1), and Relicanth window blinds (2).

Yes, that's right, folks. Sasuke is a die-hard pokenerd.

Sasuke pouted, staring at Ino. "Come on, at least try it on for a second!"

Ino sighed. "Fine, but no one ever finds out about this, you got that?"

Sasuke nodded, grinning. Ino worked with her hair for a while and applied make-up and soon, she looked exactly like a Pikachu.

At that moment, however, the door burst open, and Yoro came walking into the room. "Hey, Sasuke, I'm planning a camping trip with everyone else and was.... wonder..... ing...."

Yoro's voice faltered as his eyes fell upon Ino. All was silent, until....

"Oh. My. God," Yoro said, his eye twitching. He pulled out a bottle of sake and glared at it. "See what you've done to my mind? I don't know why I even drink you in the first place!"

Suddenly, a shout from the street below was heard. "I'm gonna go get ramen, believe it!"

Yoro sighed. "Oh yeah, that's right. Oh well, bottoms up." And with that, Yoro chugged the bottle. Five seconds later, he was passed out on the floor Sasuke's bedroom.

Ino glared at Sasuke, who raised his arms in defense. "Oh, lord, at least have the decendy to strike down Itachi along with me!"

~*~

Uchiha Itachi was checking his e-mail, same as usual, when he recieved a new message. Better not be any more spam mail, he thought darkly, opening it. This is what he read:

Dear Uchiha Itachi,

We regret to inform you that your little brother is being beaten to a bloody pulp by his girlfriend. As his dying wish, he has asked that you die with him.

However, we will instead transfer the remainder of his life to yours. So, expect to libe for another 80 years! Hope you have a good century!

Your pal,
GOD

Itachi blinked.

He raised his arms....

Opened his mouth....

And shouted, "VICTORY IS MINE!!!!"

~*~

Lee was sitting at the cafe, talking with Tenten and Neji.

"I know what you're thinking, and it's crazy," Lee said, looking at Neji.

"Yeah, I know, but think about it. What if monkeys could fly?" Neji said, raising an eyebrow. Lee just shook his head.

"Hey, isn't that Gaara?" Tenten asked, pointing across the street. Lee and Neji followed her gaze.

Coming out of the shop was Gaara, true enough. He seemed to be muttering to himself.

Neji raised an eyebrow. "Shall I go investigate?" He asked, pointing. Tenten and Lee nodded.

Sighing heavily, Neji stood up and crossed the street. "Hey, Gaara," he said, waving at the sand-nin.

Gaara jumped about a foot into the air before he turned around. His hands were twitching.

"H-Hello, Neji," he stuttered, a light blush on his face.

Neji walked up close to Gaara and stared him in the face. Gaara's blush increased.

"Um, w-what are you d-doing?" Gaara asked, turning red.

"I'm trying to make sure that you're not Hinata in Henge," Neji said, poking Gaara in the shoulder.

Lee walked over, smiling. "Hello, Gaara-san. How are you today?"

Gaara looked at Lee and turned completely red. "H-Hello, L-Lee-san." He squeaked, trying to hide something behind his back.

Lee frowned. "Hinata, is that you?"

Tenten, who had nothing better to do because she was a minor character, walked over and snatched the object from behind Gaara's back. "Are these.... flowers?"

Gaara began to shake, and nodded.

"Who are they for?" Tenten asked, smiling at Gaara.

Gaara reached out and took the flowers back from Tenten. He then walked over to Lee and held them out to him.

"W-Will you go out with m-me?" Gaara asked, turning a far darker shade of red.

Lee was quiet, and then grinned. "Oh, Gaara-kun! Of course I will go out with you! It shall be a truly youthful experience! Let us go! Yosh!"

And with that, Lee grabbed Gaara by the arm and ran off, leaving Neji and Tenten staring at each other.

"Is it just me, or is the world turning upside down?" Neji asked, looking at Tenten.

Tenten nodded slowly. "Yeah, I thuink the apocalypse is coming soon," She muttered.

~*~

Chapter complete! Next time, The beginning of the camping trip! Can our heroes get the supplies they need? Find out!

"Come on, Gaara-kun!" Lee said, pouting.

"No way am I gonna be caught dead doing that!" Gaara growled staring at the outfit in Lee's hands.

"But think of the children!" Lee whined, pouting even further.

"Can I kill the children, then?" Gaara asked, raising a non-existant eyebrow.

"NO! DON'T YOU EVEN THINK OF IT, SABAKU NO GAARA!" Lee shouted pushing the outfit into Gaara's arms.

"But I don't want to do it, Lee-kun." Gaara said, his irritation rising.

"If you don't do it, you won't get anything tonight!" Lee said, crossing his arms.

Gaara stared at the red outfit. "Fine, I'll go be Santa at the mall."

Lee grinned. "Yay! Thank you, Gaara! Now we can show everyone just how friendly you can really be!"

Gaara's eye twitched.

~*~

In the mall, the children lined up for miles, all waiting for the one thing they all had been looking forward to: Meeting Santa. Up at the front of the line, "Santa" was having a last minute discussion with Lee.

"Remember, Gaara-kun, smile, and the children won't be so scared of you're face." Lee muttered.

Gaara frowned. "What's wrong with my face?" He asked in a rather hurt voice.

"Hold that thought. The children are here!" And with that, Lee skipped over to the velvet rope blocking the area and removed it.

"Welcome to Santa's workshop, children! I'm his happy, youthful elf helper! Now, who wants to meet Santa?" Lee asked, glancing around. All of the children cheered.

"Alright, come on in then!" Lee squealed, dancing over to Gaara. Gaara closed his eyes for a moment of peace. When he opened them, he saw Konohomaru sitting on his lap.

Alright, how to do this.... Gaara mused.

"Um, ho ho ho?" Gaara asked, looking at Konohomaru. The Hokage's grandson merely looked at him blankly. Lee leaned forward.


"Gaara-kun, you must put emotion into it!" Lee whispered into Gaara's ear.

Gaara nodded. "Alright.... Ahem..... HO HO HO!" Gaara screeched at Konohomaru. Konohomaru's eyes went wide, he jumped off Gaara's lap, and ran away.

"Grandpa! Santa's gone homicidal! " He yelled as he dashed away.

Lee's smile became rather fixed. "Alright, so who's next?"

Gaara looked back at the line and nearly laughed. Standing at the front of the line was Uchiha Sasuke, wearing a large grin on his face. "Oh my god, it's my turn to meet Santa! I'm so excited!"

And with that, the Uchiha dashed over to Gaara and promptly sat on his lap.

Gaara calmed himself enough to say, "Ho ho ho, and what would you like for christmas?"

Sasuke frowned and looked at Gaara. "I want to be reunited with my clan."

Gaara looked thoughtful for a minute, then smiled. "That can be done."

Sasuke smiled. That is, he was smiling until he felt something wrapping around his feet. Looking down, he saw sand wrapping around his legs. "Hey, what the-"

The rest of Sasuke's words were cut off as the sand filled his mouth. Gaara smiled. "Sabaku Kyuu!"

The front group of children was spattered with blood and sand, and, as a result, ran off screaming for their mommies, daddies, or Hinata-chans (Yes, Naruto was there as well).

Lee glared at Gaara. "GAARA-KUN! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO!?"

"What? He wanted to be reunited with his clan. So, I gave him what he asked for, provided he went to heaven. He looked like a nice guy. I'm sure he got in." Gaara said all of this in a casual tone of voice.

Lee fumed. "One more mishap out of you, and I'll use Lotus on you!"

Gaara cringed at the look of pure rage on Lee's face. Lee vanished, only to reappear with.....

"Hey, what's with the lollipop mask?" Gaara muttered to Lee, pointing at the man now sitting on his lap. "And how old is this guy, anyway?"

Lee shrugged. "Just remember your manners, Gaara."

Gaara nodded and looked at the man on his lap. "Ho ho ho, and what would you like for christmas, young man?"

The man looked at Gaara from behind his mask.

"I'm not sure, Santa! But all I know is that TOBI IS A GOOD BOY! He can back me up on that!" Tobi said, pointing at a man in the crowd with a venus flytrap on his head.

The man nodded. "Yep, Tobi's a good boy, alright."

Tobi turned back to Gaara. "Hey, Santa, why are you wearing eyeliner?"

Gaara frowned.

"And what's with all the sand? Don't you live in the North Pole?"

Gaara's eye twitched.

"And why do you look so emo?"

"THAT'S IT!" Gaara shrieked, spreading his sand all throughout the mall. "TAYJUU SABAKU KYUU!"

~*!

"Well, all thing considered, I guess I should have had more common sense," Lee said to Gaara, pulling a pan of cookies from the oven. A bell was heard.

"Gaara-kun, can you get that?" Lee asked sweetly. Gaara blushed.

"Um, sure, Lee-kun," And with that, Gaara vanished. Five minutes later, he walked back in.

"It was another lawyer," Gaara said, raising his arms in defense.

"GOD FUCKING DAMMIT! THAT'S THE TEN HUNDREDTH ONE TODAY!" Lee shouted, introducing his head to the nearest wall.

~*~

Yoro opened his door to see Gaara standing there with a pillow.

"Um, hey, Yoro-san, can I crash here for tonight? Lee kicked me out of the house for killing a shopping mall."

Yoro blinked, then slammed the door in Gaara's face, muttering, "Damn, I must be more hammered than I thought."

~*~

Na: Happy Holidays, tebayo!
H: We hope you have a wonderful time with your families!
G: Families are for the weak.
Ne: It is fated that you should say that, Gaara.
Ten: So, anyway, Merry Christmas!
Y: Happy Hannukah!
I: A Happy Kwanzaa to you!
Sas: And all those other holidays in between.
L: May your holidays be filled with youth!
Sh: And hopefully not too troublesome.
Tem: And Happy New Year!
Sak: Here's from all of us, wishing you....
All: Happy Holidays!