woot! sex in the hay! sex in the hay! *celebrates* and man, that was hot! great job with that.

now... about the story and not just the smut. the plot thickens ne? i'm curious to read how you're going to have the war play into this story. what are naruto and sasuke going to have to endure because of the war? what are they going to have to go through, and it's kind of obvious a lot of it has to do with sasuke's half-japanese status. i'm interested in this, because you've done such an amazing job creating these characters in their time that it's easy to fall into their lives. it's easy to feel what they are feeling, and you're doing an amazing job with that. I celebrate your talent here. *worships it*

i love that kakashi is okay with the way sasuke feels for naruto, it leaves it open to pointing that kakashi is much more understanding, that kakashi is going to be a safe haven for the boys when they need one. and obviously he's going to take great care in helping them. he's the one that led to their continuous interaction.

... now, the smut. are those riding lessons going to come in handy for sasuke?

the sex was delicious and it was well done and thought out and fluffed and tender and beautiful. it was intense and it was just what they needed to be with them. naruto is super sexy as the seme and i love the way you had him gently prodding sasuke into what he wanted. he is intense and sexual and it's a great scene.

now, the final phrasing, sasuke first fell in love? come on now. you can't do that! sasuke fell in love with somebody else later on in the story? sasuke fell out of love and then fell back in love with naruto? what? *dies*

anywho. great story. great chapter. great update. i love the way you're writing it and it makes me happy.

*loves on*

~the almighty hanyou-elf

you know, you told me i wouldn't get it until after i read tenuous grasp, and i'm glad i finally got around to reading it because it just made this that much more poignant. your talent never ceases to amaze me and this piece was absolutely incredible. you did a beautiful job bringing out the love they felt for one another and the sorrow that they had to face with being forced to separate by space and time. and gods... the slip of his tongue... *weeps* this was absolutely beautiful baby. absolutely beautiful.

i love the play of emotions that pours over kakashi. he has a job to do and he's going to perform his duties, whether he wants to do so or not. he's a jounin, a tool that will be wielded by the hokage he serves. and yet, he is still human, little though he wants to be. he can not completely kill the emotions that sasuke wrought from him, both in ATG and here. you've done marvelous.

and how is it possible to forget that little bit of naruto at the end. gods, i think, honestly, that's one of the saddest parts. of course, this is filled with horribly sad parts, but the scene with naruto really sticks out to me. it's kakashi's fault he's mourning like this, and it's kakashi who comforts him. their reactions are incredibly real and heartbreaking.

and can i tell you how much i loved the way you wrote sasuke's death? now, far be it from me to say that it was beautiful because of it's poetic nature, i'm talking about the emotions that poured through it. the kakashi you wrote, the poor man you've left to linger on even after his lover and pupil has died is incredibly strong. he can continue to turn his emotions on and off at will, but eventually he will break, because he can do nothing else. and you've done an incredible job of portraying that.

an amazing job baby. amazing.
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-- BrucesGirl : I love you, thank you baby.

damn. that's what i think about when i read this story.

this is incredibly well written, very thoughtful and well composed. i love the depth of feelings that you have with tsunade and jiraiya. they are a tragic pairing and it's beautiful.

you've done amazingly well here. i really love the way you characterized jiraiya. they caring, nonchalant man that he is while still being so observant and dedicated to the people he cares about. i love that you've managed to make him so dedicated to tsunade that he's willing to do whatever it is she needs, whatever it is that she wants. he's willing to suffer if it'll make her happy.

and the way you wrote tsunade. i love that peeking at him was a common occurrence, that she did it often. it made me happy. even though she's a tough old bird, a strong and independent woman, sometimes, she just needs to be held, sometimes she just needs to not be that. i really, really liked that aspect of the this story.

this is beautiful, and it made me angst. but that's all good. great job baby!

*loves*