Sakura waited for three hours. During the first hour she was sure that Kakashi wanted her to wait for him. The way his hand had seemed so unwilling to let go of hers, though it hadn't been more than the fraction of a second, a mere twitch, as his fingers clung to hers, was enough for Sakura to believe that sometimes even he needed something – someone to hold on to.
During the second houre she began to doubt it. These were the same thoughts she had had years ago regarding Sasuke, she scolded herself. The same silly ideas that, back then, had kept her from acknowledging that it always had been Naruto who made her smile, who was there for her – no matter what. Who had cared for her. Like Kiba did now. Who cared for her and wasn't afraid, or asahmed or too preoccupied to let it show.
During the third hour she tried to convince herself that, no, she was not following any kind of pattern, because, if you actually got to know them, there was really nothing that Kakashi and Sasuke had in common. And, anyway, her affection for Kakashi was by no means and in no way of romantic nature.
At this point she decided she had spent enough time thinking. Looking for some kind of distraction she found a piece of paper in her pouch, she didn't look at it to see what it was, just began to fold the paper into a windmill, tired of slugs after her morning in the lab. She had just finished it, when the door to Rin's room opened.
Quickly she stuffed the origami back in her pouch. She tried not to stare, which was much easier said than done. If there was even the slightes change in Kakashi's composure, she wanted to be sure to notice it. But Kakashi seemed, as far as she could tell, perfectly fine, perfectly normal – sounded just like he always did when he aplogised for keeping her waiting so long.

Kakashi did not tell her to leave him alone, and so Sakura tagged along with him and the ninken as they returned to his place.
A few meters from the gate to his residence Kakashi stopped and Sakura waited for him to tell her good bye. But he just stared at her, long enough for Sakura to get uncomfortable.
"Are you alright?", she hesitantly asked. She wasn't sure why she even bothered. She already knew that he would just give her a skillfully faked smile and tell her that everything was fine, or if it was not, at least it would be in no time. For the first time though she wondered if it was really her whom he tried to convince of this truth.
"I'm not sure", his words cut through her thoughts.
"Would you..", he gestured towards his place.

The second he closed the door behind them and they became invisible to the world outside, Kakashi had his arms wrapped around Sakura and held her, or held on to her – she couldn't tell. She noticed him shivering a little, but it took her some time to understand that this was because he was – not crying, but fighting back tears.
They stood in the entry way, shoes still on their feet and stood there until Kakashi let go of her, turned away as he dapped his eye.
"Are you hungry?", he asked, his voice almost, but not quite, as calm and even as usually.
Sakura nodded, not only to humor him – she really was hungry. She followed Kakashi to the kitchen, where he dug up some left-overs and apologised for his general lack of hospitability.
He watched her eat, said he wasn't really hungry when Sakura asked why he wouldn't have anything.

It was, Sakura realised when she stood in his bathroom and changed her clothes for the shirt he had given her, the third time she spent the night at his place in only a few days, and even though she knew she wasn't doing anything wrong, she couldn't deny a slight feeling of guilt as she crawled into Kakashi's bed.
The lights were still on when he came to join her, his face unmasked. She had never actually seen him before, Sakura thought then. Yes, she had seen his face, but only when he had been unconscious or, as recently, asleep. The one time she had seen him unmasked and awake Naruto's facial expressions had so dominantly invaded his features that, Sakura realised this now, he really had looked nothing like himself – although she wasn't sure if he looked anything like himself right now either.
Kakashi didn't give her the chance to dwell on this very long though, for as soon as he lay down next to her, his face was burried somewhere between his arms and pillow. He lay with his back turned towards her, all curled up. Like a child, Sakura thought.
She watched for a while as his shoulders moved with each breath he took. He was counting them, Sakura knew, and in an affectionate sort of way it made her angry that even now he was still trying to stay all cool and controled.
"Shall I turn off the lights?", she asked. Maybe if it was dark – but Kakashi shook his head.
He turned over to look at her, pulling his blanket up over his nose as he did so (Sakura briefly wondered if he even noticed), his Sharingan covered by his left arm, his own eye moving back and forth in the futile attempt to look in both her eyes at the same time.
"You have no idea", he said slowly, as if he was only just realising this.
"You have no idea how much – you mean to me."
And before Sakura had any chance to fully grasp what she had just been told, Kakashi broke into tears, broke into tears in a way she never would have thought possible for him. She half expected him to shy away, to hide under his blanket completely, when she took his hands and stopped them from pulling his hair, from getting stuck between his teeth – he did not. He did not shy away, or hide. The second he felt her touch he crawled into her arms, clung to her as if his, or her, or both their lifes depended on it.

Eventually he calmed down, his head resting against her chest, their legs entangled – under any other circumstances it would have seemed all too suggestive, but right now it didn't matter.
Nor did that Sakura's face nestled in his hair – from up close she noticed, there were the thinest strands of black between his silverish grey – or that, somewhere between convulsive sobs his nails had left marks on her shoulder.
"Your shirt is all wet", Kakashi noted after they had remained still for some time. He moved to get up, slipped away from Sakura's grasp, and somehow managed to make his way to the dressing room and back without giving her a chance to see his, no doubt red and blotchy and tearstained, face.
When Sakura returned from changing, he was once again curled up on himself. Sakura climbed under her own spareblanket, looked at him for some time, then let her fingers brush through his hair.
"You're not ashamed, are you?", she asked.
Kakashi shook his head. He reached up, found her hand and wove his fingers between hers.
"I'm terrified", he said, sounded as if he wanted to make light of it but couldn't.
Sakura wrapped her arm around him, found her way back under his blanket. She smiled, her lips placed agains the back of his neck.
"I guess that's alright", she whispered. She felt him relax, gradually, lean back against her.
Only when she was sure that he had finally fallen asleep she turned off the light and allowed herself to try and do the same.