THANK YOU FOR THE MUSIC

Prologue: Shinobis of Sound

“ Give up yet?!” Naruto hollered as he tumbled back while rows of kunais hit against the ground.

“Dobe!” Sasuke scathingly muttered and very much tempted to punch the blonde ninja on his empty noggin. But he could not afford to be distracted when enemies surrounded them.

Cornered by four sound ninjas, Team 7 was not looking good. Sasuke’s chakra was seriously depleted and Naruto, despite being a stamina freak, was completely beaten and bruised. Only Sakura fared a little better but she could only do so much.

“Shit! Leaf ninjas incoming.” One of the sound ninjas alerted his group.

“Let’s go!” the team leader shouted and turned to one of the ninjas instructing him to take care of the three genins.

“Kill them then catch up with us!”

The ninja proceeded to execute a stance then was suddenly surrounded by a funky orange light. Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke prepared for the assault, ready to jump behind a large rock and jump on top of a large tree if worse gets to worst.

It happened in a flash. There was a huge explosion then as the hurtled for cover, streaks of strange orange light followed and hit them one by one

There was smoke and debris flying everywhere. When the dust cleared, Kakashi was standing in place where the sound ninja once stood and the gray haired ninja was strangely glowing in orange. In front of him was a split tree trunk.

After a few minutes, the orange light faded away but nevertheless Team seven together with their sensei waited inside the hospital, letting the medic nins inspect any dangerous side effects brought upon by the strange light.


Strangely enough, that explosion or that weird blast hurt no one and after the medical nins have concluded that there was no harmful after-effects, they were sent back to their respective homes.

The sound nin was never captured. In fact the certain ninja was somewhat arguing with one of his teammates.

“What in blazes was that Shinbo?”
“How the hell was I supposed to know?!”
“It’s your bloodline jutsu, you dunce! How could you not damn know?” The other sound ninja was near to tearing hair off.
“Well I did everything right and it came out weird.” The ninja named Shinbo folded his arms in defense.
“Not only was it in a disgustingly happy color of orange, it was harmless “ The sound ninja was almost screaming.” Could not even manage to exterminate a freaking gennin.”

“The tracking thing was cool though.”

“Yeah, it was” The sound ninja almost relented.” Are you sure you had it as boar-horse-dragon-tiger-dog-ram-rooster-snake?”

“No’ Then Shinbo took his time,” It was boar-horse-dragon-tiger boar-horse-dragon-tiger-dog-ram-rooster-snake -dog-ram-rooster-snake.”

“ I believe that was where you screwed up.” The sound ninja concluded.
“ Do not mock me! I should be the best person to know how to do that jutsu.”
“ Damn straight.” His colleague sarcastically commented. Really and they made this guy into a jounin, the sound ninja said to himself. As far as he was concerned, if Sound Village was a fruitcake then the snake kage was the biggest nut topping of them all. Not only does their leader picked random ninjas for lab rats, there was also this issue of skin moultings that freaked him out. However the fringe benefits were great…like dental. Not to mention a curse seal upgrade for every one thousandth enemy nin killed. Kabuto-san really knows how to drive a recruitment campaign.

“ How about I try it again so we’ll get the record straight!”
“ NONONO!! You absolute moron!”
Two seconds later, the surrounding trees were uprooted from their very roots and was turned into charcoal.
Then silence stretched after a minute or two.

“Hey what do you know…Takeo was right all along.”

THANK YOU FOR THE MUSIC

Chapter 1: Dancing Dobe Naruto

It started with a beat. Like a drum it went like ‘dum dum dum dum dum’ and his heart synchronized with the tune in his head.

Then there was music. And as with his heart, his body followed the rhythm. It went like a sudden bang as if somebody had turned the stereo full blast in the early morning.

Your eyes tell me how you love me
Can feel it in your heart beat

In a flash, Naruto propelled from his bed. His eyes red and mind both blurry and muddled.

I know you like what you see
Hold me, I'll give that you need
Wrap your love around me

“Whah?”

On that certain monologue, the blonde shinobi was already doing cartwheels whilst undressing toward the bathroom. A well-placed kick on the shower handle and the ice cold water hit his body.
“AAARRRRRRGHHH!!!”

You're so excited, I can feel you
Getting hotter, oh baby

‘ What’s happening to me?!’ Naruto screamed within as the cold water concluded his rude awakening.

I'll take you down, I'll take you down
Where no one's ever gone before

There were voices singing inside his head.
And for some mysterious reason, he couldn’t control his body.

And if you want more, if you want more
More,
more,
more

Naruto exploded out in the door of his apartment still wet and clad only in his undershorts and hitaiate, clutching his orange clothes on one hand and holding a piece of bread with his mouth.

Jump for my love

With his free hand he proceeded to put his pants on as he spun around in midair. Not noticing that in front of him an old lady keeled over with her heart on her chest from shock of seeing a spinning half nude boy catapulted at her so early in the morning.

Jump in and feel my touch

He attempted to shout a muffled apology through his shirt.

Jump you want to taste my kisses
In the night then

Naruto slid on the dusty ground as he did two somersaults, four frog leaps and a bit of a tap dance to avoid running over some vendor carts and innocent passersby.

Jump, jump for my love

---------

It’s not like Naruto to be late like this. Naruto’s two teammates were silently thinking that something must have happened to their blonde dobe.

It didn’t take long for that thought to finish when both of them saw a telltale shadow from the ground. Looking up, they saw Naruto floating in the air doing a prolonged split with his arms both outstretched and chin up.


However dumb it was, it looked like a graceful way to commit suicide.

Nearing the ground, Naruto grabbed a random tree branch from a random tree then propelled himself in front of Sakura and Sasuke, sliding on his knees. They could only stare as Naruto lost himself to music. He was punching his fist in the wind and shaking his head like there’s no tomorrow.

By now dust have settled neatly on the two onlookers.

* POOF! *

Unfailingly doing a dramatic entrance, their sensei followed the everyday protocol of greeting his students.

“Sorry I’m late I just stopped over to pi-----“

The rest of his practiced excuse was flushed down his consciousness as Naruto did a moonwalk in front of him then grabbed his crotch and made a screeching sound:’Heeeeeeheeeeheeee’. After which the blonde genin, beyond mortification, rolled facedown to the ground and bawled like there was no tomorrow.

Kakashi for once was at loss for words.

THANK YOU FOR THE MUSIC

Chapter 2: Sasuke the Singing Avenger


“ …All I know was that I was swimming in a large bowl of ramen then ‘Boom!’ next thing I knew there was this really loud music and I was all over the place.”
Kakashi listened intently while Naruto was narrating the turn of events.

He was looking for a hidden and logical conclusion beneath this utterly weird circumstance. Underneath the underneath was still yet to be discovered. Perhaps it was alignment of the stars (Kakashi has yet to look up in the Astrology section of Konoha Daily), or a burst of power from the Kyuubi brought about by the absolute and utter boredom of being quarantined inside a stomach for years.

“I dreamed of ramen before and this has never happened.” Naruto added helpfully.

“Moron.”

“ SHUT UP SASUKE!! Not everything is about you! YOU obnoxious bastaa—“

Whap!

The blonde genin recoiled when Sakura hit his head with her fist. “Aww! Sakura chan that hurt!”

“ Good!” Sakura placed her hands on her hips and glanced worryingly at her crush.

Sasuke looked calm for someone who had some spittle on his face. He was about to wipe some stray spit, when…

‘Hic!’

Everyone was silent as they turned their attention to Sasuke, not believing what they had heard. The Uchiha heir glared at them but the look of killing intent was disrupted by another hiccup.

“BWAHAHAHAHAHAH!” The blonde shinobi exploded with laughter.

“Shut up you*hic*dobe or I’ll*hic* wipe*hic*hic*hic*.”After a constant stream of hiccups, Sasuke settled for a glare. That had no effect on Naruto who was now laughing and rolling on the ground.

Sasuke didn’t have time to react when something wet was placed on his forehead. “There,there, Sasuke. This would help your hiccups.” Sakura cooed while the Uchiha heir looked up to see a piece of paper plastered on his forehead. Apparently the pink haired kunoichi used spit as paste.

Sasuke screwed his face in disgust. That’s two for the count.

Kakashi mind numbingly stared at what Sakura held on her hand. It was a familiar orange book with a bit of paper torn from one of the pages served as a moronic medical treatment for Sasuke.

The jounin frantically felt around his vest just to make sure his beloved Icha Icha Paradise was his possession.

It wasn’t there.

Then…HOW!? WHEN?

Unknown to Sakura, Kakashi had stabbed and hung people with wires for lesser offenses and as of this moment the said jounin was now contemplating where to bury her body.

“ Don’t do it, Kakashi-sensei!” A familiar voice echoed in the Jounin’s brain.

“I-Iruka-sensei?” The copy-nin was given a mental picture of the dark haired chuunin wearing a white gown and carrying a harp.
“…Are you my conscience?” Kakashi internally mused in awe.
Iruka cleared his throat before speaking.” Er… yes, temporarily.”
“ What happened to Obito?”
“ He said he would be late. Something about being stuck in the stream of consciousness.”
“ Right.” Kakashi silently vowed to himself to stay away from Gai’s homemade sake.

*Poof*

If Iruka was on his right shoulder, then on his other shoulder a new being appeared. It was ANBU Kakashi. This new entity was sporting a very tight outfit and was still wearing a signature hound mask.

The ANBU threw away the violin that came with him. “ How dare they give me something less manly.” He muttered in a deadpan voice.
“The acid jutsu should be nice on the girl.” ANBU Kakashi whispered on the jounin’s ear. ” That way you don’t have to worry about the body.”

“Don’t listen to him Kakashi-sensei! “

The ANBU entity gave Iruka a haughty look and decided that he was not worthy of a rival. Kakashi was thoughtful and tried to sort his memories for that certain acid jutsu move.

“How could you!” As if Iruka could read what’s going on his mind. “ Killing your own student for a stupid perverted book!”

“ It was a good book “ANBU Kakashi interceded”. And we were just getting to the part where he was about to insert his ----.”

“ Shut up!” Iruka bellowed as he covered his ears.

“Really Kakashi for you to have grown soft enough to listen to a prude of a chuunin dressed in a pansy white go---“

Before he could finish his sentence, ANBU Kakashi flew at the impact of Iruka’s golden harp against his face. While in midair, Iruka fished for the underwear inside the tight pants. With one foot on the ANBU’s butt, the chuunin executed the Wedgie Supernova.

The copy nin merely watched in stupefaction as ANBU Kakashi was splayed on the floor clutching his poor you-know-what while Iruka was parading and raising his fist, screaming ‘whozierdaddynow!!’

However, the entity was not ANBU Kakashi for nothing. While Iruka was a bit distracted, he bit his thumb and he called forth the legions that he represented and demanded a weapon fitting to his name. As Iruka began another attack, the ANBU had prepared a menacing fighting stance. However all of this was spoiled when with a bit of a poof, a rattle gourd appeared on each of the elite ninja’s hands.

After having a short yet ugly internal dialogue with the legions, ANBU Kakashi was informed that it was either the ‘maracas’ or the piano organ.

‘To hell with it then…’
Thus the rest of the fight consisted of swatting rattles and Iruka’s bull angry charge.

Before Kakashi was brought back to the real world, his last thought was that he had never seen a man fight so bravely with a skirt over his head.



“KAKASHI-SENSEI! They’re killing each other!”

“Hm?” The jounin replied eloquently. As with Sakura’s exaggerations, Sasuke was kicking Naruto who was rolling on the ground and still laughing. One would think that the Uchiha heir would not stoop unfairly to this one-sided fighting. However being a petty vindictive bastard usually comes into the territory of being an Avenger.

“Do you think it’s funny,huh?!” Sasuke said whilst kicking the laughing blonde genin.

“IT’S A LITTLE BIT FUNNY!!” The Uchiha heir suddenly screamed, “THIS FEELING *hic* inside.”
“What feeling, Sasuke-kun…” Sakura approached the dark haired boy. Concern was apparent on her face.

Kakashi merely stared, wondering if his prodigy of a student has finally gone insane.

By now, Sasuke had stopped kicking Naruto and was gradually moving away from them.

“I’m *hic* not one of those who can easily hide.” Sasuke mumbled as he turned away from his teammates.

“Sasuke” The pink haired genin swooned as if she was given an intimate revelation about her longtime crush.

The feeling however was partly ruined by Naruto’s sniggering.

Sasuke started to run, mumbling some unintelligible phrases about not having much money, houses and sculptors.

“Kakashi-sensei!” Sakura exclaimed at her still befuddled teacher,” Do something!”

Sakura snorted in disgust when Kakashi and Naruto were not as responsive as they should be ( i.e. they don’t want to be involved in the Uchiha angstfest). She chased Sasuke but then the Uchiha heir suddenly stopped…

And sang in a loud clear voice:

“My gift is my song…”

The whole population of Konoha (especially the female kind) momentarily paused from their activities just to listen.
Sasuke then turned around to face them.

“And this one’s for you. And you can tell everybody that this is your song.”

Sakura’s knees turned to jelly as Sasuke walked towards them. Her heart was hammering on her ribcage and most of her blood supply went up to her tomato red face. Poor girl had no chance, having been deprived for so long of her crush’s reaction only to face a total romantic musical onslaught in full blast.

“It may be quite simple but now that it’s done…”

As for the other two ninjas, suffice to say, their minds imploded.

“Hope you don't mind”
Sasuke stood in front of the pink-haired girl.
“Ano…Saa-...saa.” Sakura was stuttering as her brain flickered and finally shut down.
”I hope you don't mind that I put down in words…”
He leaned closer and whispered softly in her ear. “ How wonderful life is …”

“Now YOU’RE IN THE WORLD!!!”
Sakura then fainted on the spot, quivering with paroxysms of love. One could almost see pink hearts floating above her. Truly Sasuke’s Lovesong-no-Jutsu would go down in shinobi books as one of the most useless and most embarrassing jutsus in history, rivaling Naruto’s Centerfold-no-Jutsu by a .06 mark.

“Sat on the roof.”

Kakashi and Naruto both gave off an unmanly squeal as Sasuke slowly approached them.

“And I kicked off the moss
Well some of the verses well
They got me quite cross”

“Stay back.” Naruto shouted waving his kunai in threat whilst Kakashi tried to move away and hope to blend in with the shadows for his escape.
But still Sasuke continued to go towards them.

"But the sun's been kind"

“Do something, Kakashi-sensei!” screamed the blonde genin in desperation.
‘Naruto, you coward…” Kakashi hissed in frustration. He was about to jump into the nearest bush when he saw Naruto running pass by him.
"While I wrote this song"

Naruto suddenly froze on the spot and stood on his toes.
Kakashi resembled like a deer in the headlight when the Naruto pirouetted and ran towards him on his tiptoes.

"It's for people like you that"

And like any self-respecting jounin in the face of an embarrassing situation, Kakashi crouched down and covered his head.

"Keep it turned OOONNNN!"

Sakura’s voice could be heard amidst the singing. “ Naruto, don’t take Sasuke away from meee!!”

Kakashi looked up and saw the blonde genin waltzing the singing Uchiha, whilst Sakura was bawling on the sidelines like a bad soap opera ending.

This is one of the days that Kakashi wished that he should have stayed on bed all day.