Weeeeeeeellllllll… (well, not wheel, well,) today was a very important mission. Everyone was giddy with excitement, as we prepared ourselves. Kakashi went over the plan with us one more time

Kakashi: Glomp, Garra, you’ll be positioned here on either side of the bed, behind the headboard

Me: Muhuhahaha!
Garra: This, will be… interesting *smirk * Hmm. *Evil raspy Garra chuckle *

Kakashi: Sakura, Ino, it will be your job to hug him.

Sakura & Ino: *giggle giggle giggle * how better celebrate than with two cute girls hugging you?! Eaeeeeeeaeeeeeeee!!

Kakashi: Itachi, you’ll blow the confetti in his face, and Orochimaru will be in charge of the lights

Orochimaru: *Licks lips, chuckles * Excellent! Hmm?
Itachi: Heeee :D

Kakashi: Neji, you’ll smile and look cute.

Me: You do that so well!
Neji: ;)

Kakashi: Shikamaru, it will be your job to use your Shadow Possession Jutsu to keep him right where we want him!

Me: This is going to be Saske’s best Birthday EVER!!
Sakura & Ino: *Jumping up and down squealing *
Orochimaru: It will be sssssssssssuch a ssssurprise, mh? X)

Kiba: Wait, wait wait, I’m at the end right?

Kakashi: *Sigh * Okay, one more time; Orochimaru turns on the lights to wake him up, Glomp and Garra wake him up further by pushing him out of bed

Shikamaru: He won’t get up otherwise. He’ll want to sleep-in.
Me: *Nod nod *
Ino: Shika’s a sleeping expert!!

Kakashi: Sakura and Ino will give him a BIG Birthday hug, Itachi will blow confetti in his face to make it more magical *Stars in eyes *

Neji: Yay! ;)
Haku: *Claps hands * Magic fun!

Kakashi: Kiba and Akamaru will say happy birthday after Shikamaru uses his Shadow Possession Jutsu

Akamaru: *Ruff! * :P

Kakashi: Chogi will bring the cake, and Haku will sing Happy Birthday. ;)

Haku: :3

Kakashi: So the order is Orochimaru, Glomp & Garra, Sakura & Ino, Ittachi, Shikamaru, Kiba & Akamaru, Chogi, Haku.
Ready team?

All: Thunderbirds are go!!
* We slowly creep into Sasuke’s room, getting ready to surprise him. We all got into our positions, and waited as well all counted. 1, 2, 3, 8, 9, 10! *

Orochimaru: *Flicks on the lights, licks lips, smiles *
Sasuke: *Jolts up, sitting and staring at Orochimaru in fear *
Me & Garra: *Smile down at him and chuckle *
Sasuke: *Stumbles, jumping out of bed, confusing our faces with malice… o_0 *
Sakura & Ino: *Grab at Sasuke, now standing, and each hug an arm * giggle giggle
Sasuke: Ahhh! *Terrified shudder as he looks at the two fangirls, wondering in fear what they are doing in his bedroom 0,0 *
Itachi: *Shadingan eyes shimmer, wink, blows confetti in Sasuke’s face *
Sasuke: *Eyes go wide * B-b-b-b-brother? .. *Terror rises in Sasuke at the sight of his brother again * Eep! *Sasuke makes a move to run, but finds that he can’t move *
Shikamaru: *Smirk * Got ya. *Smirk *
Sasuke: *In utter panic, his mind running wild *
Kiba & Akamaru: *Kiba lifts Akamaru to give Sasuke a Birthday kiss from his puppy on the back of the neck *
Sasuke: EEEP!!! A-a-a-a-a-a-a-h !!!!!!!!!!*Eyes searching frantically for where Oruchimaru has gone as he fells a lick at the back of his neck *
Chogi: *Brings in the big cake as planned, smiling down at the Birthday boy *
Sasuke: *Hears dull thuds in the distance, feels ground shaking as he looks up into Chogi’s glowering face * gasp *quick intake of air *
Haku: Happy Birthday….. to you….Happy Birthday……to you……Happy Birthday- *leans towards his friend smiling * -dear Sasuke-
Sasuke: *Hears a ghostly soft and eerily gentle voice singing happy birthday * quick intake of breath *Sees the first calm face, it leans towards him, continuing it’s sick song, so pale, sooo cold… *
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKKKKKK!!!!

*Thud *
Sasuke: *Fallen on the ground, unconscious, eyes still wide in pure terror *
Shikamaru: He didn’t look THAT tired? What a drag.

Chogi: What gives?
Me: *Pout * We followed the plan…
Haku: *Tremble tremble * Did I do something wrong? *Tear *
Neji: Lets put him back in bed and be waiting for him when he wakes up! :3

All: *Put Sasuke back to bed and all sit around the bed, not leaving an empty space at any edge or corner, and wait for him to wake up. All hovering over Sasuke smiling *


Sasuke had to undergo extensive therapy after his B-day Bash! My Feelings were hurt. I mean come on! Everyone had worked so hard to surprise him for his birthday and he didn’t even say thank you! What a jerk. So I posted stills of the video we had taken of it all over the house, especially his room. I also punched him in the face.

Kakashi: *Still in the living room reading his book, waiting for the party to start *

Don’t own Naruto, but would be richer than JK if I did

(Sorry Rowling, but the world of Sweet-Little-Book-Loving-Explody-Twig-Lovers were never a match for the Anime world, especially those scary fan girls) *Runs from hoard of FanGirls throwing merchandise at me *

JK Rolling: But I thought you loved my books Glomp? *Tear *

Me: I DO love your books, but Anime freaks are all kick-ass weirdo’s who are all completely insane…

Shikamaru: That explains why you fit right in!

Me: *Eye twitch *

Naruto: Because you like Anime and Manga, but more to the point, dress REALLY REALLY weird, know stupid things about the ‘Anime World’ that will…never…help you… in real....life- *Stops when he see’s eye twitching and an evil aura *

Sakura: NARUTO!!!!! *Throws apple at his head *

Naruto: Haha! Missed- *Apple hits him between the eyes, rolls to floor. Naruto picks up apple and bites it with the stem facing vertically *

Sakura: *Twitch twitch * The heck? THAT’S how you eat an apple?

Naruto: *Making a huge mess and talking with his mouth open * Hw-hat djo ouoo mem? Eaioh Sazzzuka?! (What do you mean? Eh, Sakura?)

Me: Fail Naruto. You obviously has no clue how to eat an apple properly.

Neji: *Walking in as I say that with his back to Naruto * There is no proper way to eat an apple Glomp. It’s an apple, your just being silly.

Naruto: *Mouth full of apple chunks * Mh he! Pf ehck *Apple bits fall out of his mouth. His lips, nose, and forehead get apple juice on them from biting into the apple awkwardly. *

Neji: I stand corrected.

Sasuke: That’s because Naruto’s an idiot.

Hinata: I-i-i d-don’t think Na-Naruto-k-hun-n is an idiot…. *Hinata whispers, blush *

Naruto: Pfory gek unt erp ouis, hwoug unk eegrhp? (Sorry I can’t hear you, could you speak up?)

Hinata: Huh? *Blush *

Naruto: PFORY GEK UNT ERP OUIS, HWOUG UNK ERRGHP? (SORRY, I CAN’T HEAR YOU, COULD YOU SPEAK UP?)

Neji: My poor, poor, cousin… such a kind and sweet heart- poor Hinata fell for this slob.

Hinata: Eh?! *Blush *

Neji: Tsk. Naruto, you had better tighten your manners. As of right now, you are unfit for Hinata to be seen with.

Hinata: EH?! *Big Blush *

Sakura: Let alone marry. Ugh, really Naruto, your disgusting.

Ino: Hinata? What do you see in this guy?

Hinata: EH?! *BLUSH, nosebleed, faints. *

Me: Wow. Didn’t think she’d last as long as she did… hmm…

Shikamaru: Billboard-Pig? When did you get here?

Sakura & Ino: WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME!

Shikamaru: That’s the nick-name you call each other…

Sakura & Ino: ONLY WE CAN CALl EACHOTHER THAT!!

Me: *sweatdrops *

Kiba: *Pops up * NOOOO!!! HINATA!!!

Me: What the-

Kiba and Akamaruo: *Night sky at a cliff background appears. Kiba and Akamaru howl at the moon *

Naruto: CHOM-nom-nom *Apple *

Me: What did that apple ever do to you, eh Naruto?

Neji: Wait! Naruto! DON’T ANSWER!!

Naruto: Arguf nobgt? (And why not?) *Mouth full of apple, pieces fall out *

Neji: *Faints, fluttering to the ground slowly like a feather * So grossss….

Me: *Snort laugh *

Sasuke: Loser. Your so immature.

Sakura: And gross.
*Naruto anime faints after being insulted by Sakura *

Ino: And…. And ORANGE!

Sasuke: *Turns head * Orange? Really? Orange?
*Sakura faints because Ino was acknowledged by Sasuke *

Ino: *Stars in eyes * H-he acknowledged my existence!! Eeee!! *Faints with a thud *

Sasuke: Orange?

Orochimaru: *Runs into room, cue blazing saddles music * SASUKEEEE!!!!! I WANT YOUR BODY!!!

Sasuke: *Girly scream *
*Sasuke runs off into the sunset as Orochimaru chases him *

Kabuto: You can have my body! Orichimaruuuuuuuuuuuu !!*Runs after them. They all slowly fad off into the sunset *

Me: Looks like their blasting off again.

(Note: Naruto, Sakura, Neji, Sasuke, Hinata, Ino, Orochimaru, Kabuto, and Kiba *still moon-houling * are all incapacitated.)

Shikamaru: …

Lee: *Pops up * EMBRACE YOUR POWER OF YOUTH!!! *Smacked down by Shikamaru *

Fact: 1/11 ninja are left conscious after Glomp discusses the proper way to eat and apple

Me: Actually, Shikamaru fell asleep.

Sasuke: *Still running off into the sunset * Haha- loser.

I get board very easily. Me, Orochimaru, Gaara, Ino, and Chogi were all sitting in my living room. I was poking Ino with a the TV remote, Gaara was braiding Orochimaru’s hair, and Chogi was eating a bag of chips. Oh, and Tobi was colouring in my math text book (bad boy!)I’m not sure what started it, but I like to blame Itachi. Anyways, maybe it was the weather, or maybe the lack of vanilla pudding in the house *tear *, but we were feeling a little low on self-esteem.

Orochimaru: Am I fat? I mean, do I look fat to you Gaara?

Me: Tobi thinks I’m fat. *Tear *

Tobi: Tobi never said that!

Ino: Guys only like skinny girls, and they still don’t notice me TT .TT

Gaara: I’ve been on all these diets and still can’t lose a few pounds…

Orochimaru: When I wear all these robes, I feel like I’m trying to cover up.

Me: You have nothing to be ashamed of. You have a lovely figure.

Gaara: I try to stay fit, but lack the motivation.

Me: Tobi thinks I look like a blimp!! WAHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Tobi: NO I DON’T!!

Me: *Sniffle *

Tobi: You look okay and all!! *Smile * Tobi is a goo-

Me: TOBI IS TOO SCARED TO TELL ME HOW BAD I LOOK!!! I CAN’T BELIEVE I LET IT GET THIS BAD!! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Tobi: No! Wait! Um… did you lose weight? *Nervous smile *

Me: So you thought I was REALY bad before *whimper *

Gaara: I think I have rolls. MY STOMACH IS LIKE A SERIES OF SAND DUNES!!

Orochimaru: I JUST CAN’T STAND THE NEED TO IMPRESS EVERYONE ANYMORE!!

Tobi: I have zits, so I wear a mask T_T

Ino: *In the corner crying *

Chogi: I gave up a while ago.

Temari: *Walks in and sees Ino, still in the corner crying, Chogi was admitting to Orochimaru that he knew people talked about him and it hurt, Gaara was staring at his stomach, and I was under the coffee table with Chogi’s now empty bag of chips on my head *

* Aura of depression *

Temari: What’s with you guys?

Orochimaru: *begins bawling and hugs Chogi *

Temari: Okay… sorry I asked…

Well, we stayed in the living room sulking for what seemed like years, and so, in other words, half an hour later, we chased Haku and put ribbons in his hair.

:P Moral: You are beautiful, even if you aren’t.

But seriously, if you don’t feel beautiful, find friends that make you feel you are, and don’t spend all your time worrying about what you look like.

Konohamaru: Yup yup!

I don’t own Naruto, but I think Orochimaru has been looking at him funny lately…

Today was my last chance to finish the three essays that I had due tomorrow. I was trying to avoid all the nin’s since they normally cause explosions, destruction, mayhem, and make each other cry… and I always seem to be the one to clean up/explain to the police what happened.
My phone just wouldn’t stop ringing though!

Phony: Ring ring!!

Me: *deep voice * Hello.

Naruto: Um… is Glomp there?

Me: *deep voice * heh heh…

Naruto: Could you put her on?

Me: *D.V. * Sorry, I can’t do that.

Naruto: 0.o huh?

Me: *D.V. * Now your chakra is mine! *Normal voice: Screams * Ahh!! NOOO!! Can’t- move- ugh. *Thud *

Naruto: Eep!

He got really scared and I heard him crying downstairs. Haha. Loser.

Phony: Ring ring!

Me: Hello?

Konan: Where the hell are you?!

Me: Um… *thinking how to get off the phone *

Konan: I wan’na cookie! Where do you keep them!?

Me: *Random fake voice * Get off the tracks! *Normal Voice * huh- OH SHIT! *Random Fake Voice * Get outta the way! There’s a train coming!

Phony: beep. Beep beep. Beep. Disconnected.

Konana: *Girly shriek *

Me: heh heh! Two down!

Phony: Ring ring!

Itachi: Where’s my nail polish?!

Me: *Nasal voice * Suicide hotline, please hold…

Itachi: *Hangs up *

Phonny: Ring, ring

Me: oh, for the love of- *picks up phone * Hi.

Haku: Glomomomp!!! I-

Me: Glomp is not here right now.

Haku: But-

Me: Leave a message after the beep, and I might check it and get back to you.

Haku: *tear *

Me: Beep! *Smiles *

Haku: *Sob * everyone is going crazy, and Deidara and Konan are fighting, and Itachi killed Lee because he didn’t have nail polish…

Me: *Again? That kid dies a lot in this house… *

Haku: And Naruto is crying, and Temari beat him up…

Me: …

Haku: And I’m hiding in the fridge because they are trying to cut off my head and sell my hair on ebay to buy cookies and nail polish…

Orochimaur: *Sing song voice (creeper) * Haku! Where are you? It’s all right… we wont *smirk * hurt you… Hmm… *Hee hee * Oh, Haku! Come out wherever you are! *Tee hee! *

Haku: *Cries into phone in a whisper * I’m scared Glomp!

Orochimaru: *Licks lips * Lets start at the cupboards, shall we? Hmm? *Creeper smile *

Haku: Help. Me.

Phonie: Low battery. Disconnected.

Me: *Throws phone across room * THAT’S IT!! *Runs downstairs *

Me: CAN’T YOU AL BE QUIET FOR TWO MINUTES!!

* Beats all the nin’s senseless, ties them up, makes Konan and Itachi, and Deidara watch me give Haku all the cookies and pour all the nail polish into Deidara’s clay *

Haku: :3

Me: *Evil smirk * Temari and Orochimaru?

Temari and Orochimaru: Yes’ums *look down guiltily *

Me: *Evil smile as I walk up the stairs * Your lucky I don’t cut off Orochimaru’s tongue and put it in Temari’s hair. *Evil chuckle *

Everyone: Eep!!

Me: *Upstairs * Don’t make me come back down there! Now be good little nin’s and STAY QUIET!!

Everyone: *Shudders *

Almost finished my project, but Haku was a sap and untied them all.

Me: Baka…

Anyways, I probably scared them all for life, or at least until next week… hee hee… heh heh heh… Well, everyone but Temari since she hid so well… but I made up for it by scaring her brother Kankuro for life… Wow, I feel like this is a gang, I punish their family members when they screw up… o.0
Ah, well, it was fun anyways.

Me: *Cracks knuckles * Back to the salt mines…

This is based on what legit happened this morning… and then it sort of got a mind of it’s own. (Have changed their names ;3)

I was on my way to school with my carpool: my neighbors that live down the street from me, and Itachi, Gaara, and Neji. Also tagging along are Kankuro, Sasuke, and Ino. (for whatever reason… likely to cause mayhem in my school. Secretly, I was hoping that they would be able to get me out of my social test)

Having known my friends down the block since forever, I call them my siblings. This gives me two annoying brothers, one my own age (Bob), and one three years younger (Joe), and an annoying sister who is six years my younger (Dora).

Joe: *butchering stairway to heaven *

Me: Shuddup Joe.

Ino & Dora: Blah blah blah hair stuffs, blah blah blah pink, blah blah blah girly nonsense…

Bob: MAKE IT STOP!!! *clutches hands to ears and screams*

Itachi & Sasuke: * Trademark Uchiha glare*

Gaara: Neji… you have split ends…

Neji: *Cries*

Me: SHUDDUP JOE.

Kankuro: You’re a meany!! *Points at Gaara*

Bob: * Butchering caramel dancing*

Me: WHY ARE MY BROTHRS SO LAMMMMMMEEEEE!!

Ino: *Playing with Dora’s hair as they continue talking nonsense *

Itachi: Your pathetic, Sasuke… *Poke *

Me: POKE THE UKE! POKE THE UKE!

Ino: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!! WHY DID HE HAVE SUCH AN unfortunate NAME!!

Neji: *Still crying*

Kankuro: You should be nicer Gaara!!

Gaara: No.

Kankuro: I’LL TELL TAMARI!!

Sasuke: * Poking Itachi* Itachi. Itachi. Itachi. Itachi. Hey, hey brother? Itachi. Itachi. Hey hey…

Joe & Bob: *Stilll singing badly, has moved onto other random useless songs, still managing to make me pity the poor saps who wrote them *

Me: OMIGORSH!! SHUT YOUR DAMB FACES YOU BAKKAS!!

Gaara: No.

Kankuro: I’M TELLING!!!

Sasuke: * Poke*

Me, Gaara, Itachi: YOU MIGHT BE MY BROTHER, BUT I’LL STILL KILL YOU!!

Itachi: F*ck off no jutsu!!

Gaara: Sand coffin!!

Me: *Throws dashboard, screaming like Hidan *

5 Minutes later >>>

We tried to crawl away from the wreckage, but Itachi’s F*ck off no jutso had a second wave, and we all went splodie!

(Hee hee, splodie…)

And, THAT is why I was late for my social test, everyone in my carpool did a Shakespeare… and then a marry sue, coming back to life cause they never die!!

(My teacher didn’t believe me, but gave me 5 minutes extra for the test anyways cause she’s awesome ;3)

Well, being the type of person who watches shows like mayday and then has a flight on a plane, I was freaking out about my trip. I don’t know what’s with these ninja’s though. They kill people without a second thought and yet they are SO superstitious . Ugh.

Anyways, my buddy Oro was going with me as was Kakashi.

Orochimaru: why do we need an emergency exit if we’re flying?

Me: In case of a crash

Oro: *Evil grin *

Me: *Eye roll *

Kakashi: *Reads book *

You’ve probably heard of snakes on a plane, right? Oro the pedo snake on a plane…. Needless to say, give the sannin his orange juice or have problems

Lady: *Wheels up cart of stuff * It’s lunch right now, would you like a bagged tuna sandwich, egg, or a soup? *Smile *

Me: SOUPSOUPSOUP!!! *Cough cough * Um.. ehem… I mean, I think I would like the souppleasethankyouverymuch!!

Kakashi: *Sweat drop * You talk too fast.

Orochimaru: *Licks lips *

Me: *Stars in eyes * SOUP!!

Kakashi: *Mutters * Freaks.

Lady: *Looks to Kakashi * And you sir?

Kakashi: *Reading book * Tuna sandwich please.

Me: PUT DOWN YOUR BOOK!! YOU RUN THE RISK OF DISCRACING THE SOUP!!!

Everyone but me: *Collective sweat drop *

Me: DON’T JUDGE ME!!!!

Lady: *Cough cough * And what about you? *Sweat smile *

Orochimaru: A live mouse.

Me: EWEWEW!!!

Lady: …

Kakashi: Wtf?

Lady: Um…

Orochimaru: *Licks lips, creep smile*

Lady: I h-hear the salad is far b-better?

Me: YOU MEAN SOUP!!! *Blows her hair back because I was loud as hell.*

Lady: *Fixes hair * R-r-right!! Eep! *Why’d I get stuck with the freaks*

Orochimaru: Hee hee hee… *head turns sideways and he smiles like an idiot.*

Lady: Wh-why d-did you w-want a L-L-LIVE m-mouse… s-sir?

Kakashi: *Sweat drops and looks at her* Didn’t think she was a hyugga *Looks to Orochimaru and sweat drops, damn snake sannin is a freak! *

Orochimaru: *Serious* You didn’t think I would want to eat a DEAD one, hmm? *Not so serious grin*

Me: Creeper… SOUP!!

Lee: *Pops out of no where* YOUTH!!

Me: SOUP!!

Lee: YOUTH!!

Me: SOUP!!

Lee: YOUTH!!

Me: SOUP!!

Lee: YOUTH!!

Me: SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUPPPPPPPP!!! *Shakes head like a retard*

Kakashi: SHUT UP ALREADY!!

Lady: Um…

Orochimaru: I want orange juice.

Lady: We don’t have orange juice sir.

Kakashi: He’s an ‘it’, not a ‘sir’.

Orochimaru: *Smiles friendly* I. Want. Orange. Juice. *Orders not so friendly*

Lady: B-but-

Orochimaru: *Evil fricken aura* I WANT ORANGE JUICE DAMN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Five minutes later…

Snakes: *fricken everywhere*

Kakashi: *Reading book, doesn’t notice*

Me: *Soup bowl on head, stupid grin*

Lady: *Numerous shrikes that remind me of Konoa fan girls*

Pilots: *Swallowed*

Plane: *Crashing*

Everyone on the plane beside me and my freak friends: *Spazing and screaming, being eaten, spazing, being bitten, spazing, freaking out, and finally, spazzing*

Orochimaru: *Chuckling madly and cackling*

30 minutes later in the pacific ocean with emergency rescue peoples.

Me: I’m sorry, he forgot to take his meds is all.

Orochimaru: DON’T JUDGE ME!!

Me: You can’t quote me like that!!

Orochimaru: Can so!

Me: Nu uh!!

Orochimaru: Well I am!!

Me: Can. Not. DOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kakashi: *Still in plane, reading book as it sinks.*

Rescue dude: Um…

Lee: YOUTH!!!

Me: SOUP!!

Orochimaru: Yay I win!!

Me: NUH! UHHHH!!!

Kakashi: *No longer drowning because he’s a baka* I apologize on behalf of all of them. None of them are completely themselves…

Later…

Judge Fricken Judy: 10 years to life for being stupid!!!!!

Fantasy Madiline: I had this dream where Gaara went to the chunin exams in a leash… is that weird?

Chunin exams inspired by Fantasy Madeline because she’s half as bizarre as me. ^-^

I was chilling at Kiba’s house because I wanted him to know what a blown up stove feels like when I heard a bunch of yelling. Like any respectable person, I did the logical thing when you hear danger and ran to the source!

When I got there it was a seen right out of the chunin exams: Sasuke in a tree (nerd), Gaara in a tree (dorky nerd), Temari blushing like a drunk (Bad ass nerd), and Kankuro being Kankuro (a sand nerd). There was some other stuff but I didn’t really care about Konohamaru’s situation (bratty nerd…grumble).

Sasuke: *throws rock at Kankuro* Drop him.

Kankuro: *Glares like the rock hurt a lot*

Me: Wimp…

Temari: Tch

Me: That’s not a word…

Temari: *Glares cause she’s bad ass*

Gaara: Drop him… or I’ll kill you

Collective: *Shudder*

Me: Wait a second… is that a—

Sasuke: Gafaf!

Me: Again… That’s not a word…

Naruto: Huh? Wait? What? Huh? What’s everyone looking at? Huh? What wait- no- huh? *flips head back and forth*

Me: *dead pans* Those are words… but your sentence structure is all-

Temari: Look! We had to!!

Gaara: *Looks evil again… then cries*

Sakura: Why is there a-

Kankuro: *blush* We had to be careful he didn’t kill anyone! It was necessary!!

Sasuke: He needed a leash?

Naruto: And a pink bow?

Sakura: … *eye twitch*

Me: *Laughing on the ground*

Gaara: Don’t judge me! *sniffle*

Sasuke: Loser

Lee: *pops up * BE youthful young GAARA!! Don’t give in to-

Gaara: SAND COFFIN!!!

And just like that, an amazing battle scene of epic is gone… poof… but Lee will probably be fine and live to round hose kick my stove again! (damn ninjas and their hatred of stoves…) (damn ninjas and their ooc and rebirth in my stories) (Damn my hair cause it’s falling in my face and annoying) (damn-

Hidan: STFU!! No on cares Glomp!

Me: *Evil look *

Orochimaru: Damn Glomp for destroying the village on an after thought before I could. *Cries*

Me: Go watch you soaps you baby!

Kabuto: Glo-omp! Look! It’s a bed! And a pillow and a –aeeeebdftjknsajknv;vaububvsusiraenv[sivprebvkvjb rjvrbeiuruvpreagbg7843gbid

Me: *Stopped typing, head hit keyboard* sleep…. Groan…
*****************RE WRITED NESSESSS**************************

Kabuto: *Smirk*

Me: FOOLED YOU!! MUAHAH!!!

Kabuto: *Terror face*

Me: You seriously thought I would fall for this two nights in a row?

Naruto: I’ve been underestimated my whole life too Glomp! Believe it!!

Me: DON’T TRY TO RELATE TO ME!!!!

Sakura: …

Kankuro: …

Gaara: The village is intact. The bizarre narrating text lied

Me: *Glares*

Konohamaru: *Looks at Gaara’s pink frilly leash* HAHAHAHA!! Ah ha! Ha ha ha!!

Sakura: NARUTOOOOO!! *Smacks Naruto*

Naruto: *Get’s smacked* Ahh, Sakura chan… *Rubs head*

Sakura: *Points finger* Now he’s as annoying as you!!!

Naruto: B-but Sakura chan!!!

Sasuke: Loser…

Orochimaru: *Pops up* Sasuke kun… hee hee….

Sasuke: Yelp!! *Runs away*

Orochimaru: COME HERE SASUKE KUN!!! I WONT BITE… MUCH!! I JUST WANT TO USE YOUR BODY TO MAINTAIN MY OWN FOR ALL OF ETERNITY OR WHEN I GET BOARD OF SHARINGAN!!

Sakura: BUT I LOVE YOUuuuuuu!!!

Naruto: Wait… what were we talking about again?

Temari: This is our competition?

Kaknuro: Leaf genin are pathetic

All: *Looks at Gaara and laughs*

Gaara: It’s not funny!!!

Laughs…

Gaara: *Grabs head* MAMAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! *Cries, raises shaky fist* I’m gonna sand coffin you all, believe it *Whimper*

All: *Ignor and eat cake*

Gaara: *Cries*

Naruto: Want some cake?

Gaara: *Eats Naruto, smirks*

Temari: *Drops leash and backs away slowly*

Kankuro: RUUUUNNNN!!!

All: *Run away*

Gaara: Hee hee…

Kabuto: *Hiding behind tree* Whew… that was a close one *Fixes glasses*

Me: *Grins* Ready to die?

Kabuto: *Girly scream*

Me: *Thinking about evil scheme to keep him paranoid* I’ll get you back later.. heheh heh…

Kabuto: *Tears*

Me: *Grins* Sleep with one eye open… Kabuto…

Kabuto: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! *Cries some more*

Me: heh heh

Well, Gaara destroyed the half of the village I didn’t destroy yesterday. At least I’m not as tired now ;p

Ah well, Kiba was pretty sad about his stove, and Kabuto keeps hiding under things when I walk into rooms… heh heh heh…

Anyways, Gaara is never going to be able to live this one down… heeeeeeee heeeeeee heh….

Ugh. Itachi has recently decided that he LOVES Tabatha’s salon takeover. And I mean LOVE. He watches the damn thing with a burning passion of a thousand passive aggressive cats! I SWEAR!

But anyways, he’s started this thing where he cuts peoples hair at random intervals. But anyways, breakfast today was faunny… heeeee

Kisame: Hey, Itachi san, could you pass the toast? *Looks over at no response from Itachi*

Me: *Grabs Kisame’s tuft of hair*

Kisame: Ahh! Itachi SAN!!! Glomp’s Huuuurtin ma hairs!! *Cries*

Me: *Grins*

Itachi: *Pops up and cuts the hair I’m holding up*

Ino: *Squeals and cries in fright*

Temari: Pfff *snort laughs* Pathetic wimps. *Eats cereal*

Kakashi: *Reads perverted book*

Me: NO READING YOUR CRAPY BOOKS AT BREAKFAST!!!

Naruto: *Mouth full of Ramen*

Neji: I thought Glomp said you couldn’t eat anymore of her ramen?

Naruto: Oops! *Goes pale. Runs away*

Itachi: *Pops up to cut Temari’s hair*

Temari: *Eats cereal calmly*

Lee: *Does push ups on table*

Me: GET OFF THE TABLE YOU BAKA!!

Kankuro: *Snort laughs*

Kabuto: *Hidding in fear from my threats to get back at him*

Itachi: *About to cut Temari’s hair*

Temari: *Continues drinking milk calmly, stabs Itachi’s hand with fork*

Itachi: *Cries in pain*

Pein: *pops up out of no where* You must know pain…. *disapears*

Me: Next person to randomly appear gets- KAKASHI STOP READING THAT BOOK!!!- Kakahsi’s book SHOVED DOWN THEIR THROAT!!!

Kabuto: *Falls over and looks like he’s pooping up when he jumps while I glare at him* Meh-meh-meep!!

Me: *Grins.* Hee heee…. *Smikrs*

Kabuto: I-I- Meh- eep!!

Me: I’ll get you later… Kabuto…

Kabuto: *Runs away crying* OROCHIMAARUUUUUUUUUU!!!!

Temari: *snort laughs*

Kisame: *Still crying over his hair*

Itachi: He-help! Kisame! A-ah-Ow! H-h-heh! Help!! *Wheazy in pain voice*

Kisame: You cut my hair *pouts*

Temari: *Still drinking milk*

Itachi: Gl-glomp!!

Me: *Pulls fork out of Itachi’s hands, grabs scissors* I’m Glomp, and I’m taking over.

Itachi: *cries*

Sakura: SASUKE!!! I LOVE YO-

Sasuke: There’s a time and a place, Sakura.

Sakura: *stars in eyes* Sas-uke?

Sasuke: Unfortunatly for you, I’m asexual and it will never be your time. *Walks away all intense and emo like*

Naruto: SAsSSSSSSSSSKKKEEE!!!

Me: STFU. I’m trying to eat!! KAKAHSI THAT BOOK I SWEAR!!!!!!!

Kakashi: *not listening*

Akamaru: *eats book*

Itachi: *Begging for the scissors*

Me: No more cable for you *Chastizes*

Itachi: *runs away crying*

Orochimaru: Anyone wanna watch-

Temari: *Puts down milk* You got to ban that damn awful hair show. I ban soap operas from Orochimaru.

Sakura: It’s not that the SHOW is bad, it’s just that Itachi is annoying when he watches it ^-^

Sai: Ok- even ‘I’ can tell Sakura is acting smily-fake to get a chance at watching-erhlvelhvqlbjb mef?

Sakura: *Covers mouth* STFU SAI!!

Deidara: I KNOW THE ANSWER!! *Smiles all helpful like*

Temari: DON’T TRUST HIM!!

Deidara: KATSU!!!

Me: DAMN NINJASSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

So, I had to buy a new tv today….
Anyways, Itachi keeps trying to cut Kabuto’s hair, and needless to say, I feel less inclined than usual to help him… which is to say, I never help them…. Hee heee, I’m gonna go tape Itachi’s eyes open and make him watch professional golf… heeeeeeee, might tell THAT story later… heeee

There are some times, in everyones life, that you will want ninjas to make you cookies. And today was one of them.

Itachi: No.

Me: Awwwww! Why not!!

Sasori: I don’t have time for this, let me through.

Me: I’LL ALCEMIZE YOUR FACE!!!

Itachi: Still no.

Me: PUT YOUR NAME ON THE INTERNET!!!

Sasori: *Sighs*

Me: I’ll tell Haruhi Suzamia that ninja’s are real and in my house… *evil grin*

Itachi: *Cowers*

Sasori: You wouldn’t

Me: *Nod nod *

Sasori: Fine. You win. We’ll make the cookies.

Itachi: *Hiding behind Sasori and crying*

Me: *Throws bowl at head *

Temari: Bakkkaaaas.

Me: STOP BEING SUCH A SMART ASS!!! *angry rampage through the house*

Naruto: *Cowering in fear under the table*

Temari: Whats wrong with Glomp?

Itachi: Exams are tow weeks away

Me: *from upstairs* WHAAAAAAAAAT!!!! *comes running down all panicked* I THOUGHT I HAD 25 DAYS STILL!!!! ITACHI!!! YOUR GOING TO PAY FOR THIS!!! WHERE’S KABUTO!!?! I WANT TO KICK SOMETHING!!!

Neji: Exams.

Me: *Cries on floor*

Kabuto: At least I’m safe for now! OROCHIMARUUUUUUUU!!!! *Runs off to go eat the cookies Itachi made and steal some for Orochimaru*

Sakura: CHA!!!

Naruto: Sakura chan… what was the point in that cha?”

Sakura: I’m showing Glomp that exams are NOTHING compaired to the ferocity of a kunoichi!!

Sasuke: Sakura…

Sakura: Oh Sasuke Kun! *Faints on the floor*

Sasuke: It’s like iniciation all over again *face palms*

Naruto: I’d just beat up the exams!! Believe it!!

Sasuke: Naruto, you dobe. Exams are paper. You need brains… like using genjustu.

Kurinai: *Pops up* did someone say genjutsu?

Gaara: *pops up for no aperant reason than explanation* no, go away, we never feature you in these stories.

Kurinai: *cries*

Lee: *Cries* EXAMS SAP AWAY YOUTH!!!

Gai: *Cries in agreement*

Orochimaru: *Cries* Glomp is even meaner than usual!

Kabuto: *Wails*

Naruto: Exams suck… believe it…. *forlorn and depressed*

Haku: CHEAR UP!! At least you don’t have to kill your graduationg class to pass!!

Zabuza: *pops up, big ass sword and all, cries, pops down*

Haku: Za-zabuza? I m-made Zabuza cr-cry? *wails louder than Kabuto*

Deidara: I’m out of clay… *cries*

Sasori: I don’t have tear ducts *wishes he could cry*

Itachi: I burn the cookies…

Neji: Your going to die Itachi.

Itachi: *Cries*

Me: *crying*

Neji: Glomp isn’t even in the mood for blaming Itachi? *Freaks out then cries*

Fandom: No one ever updates during exams… *collective cry*

Everyone else: *Cries*

EXAMS. They suck.

Well, I'm about to take this Kabuto grudge to a close. As boring as authors notes can be, your update for this week is still here, so don't worry about me only posting for advice.

I would like to know: who should I put my wrath to next?

Out of all the Naruto cannon characters, who would you like me to bludgeon once a week? Come on, I know you've got your favorites. I will be giving two weeks for this new root of all evil to be voted for.

Vote via review or the contact option at my profile. Include 3 or more characters with your vote. You can re-vote or change your mind in the next two weeks. You can, but don't have to, tell me what your reasonings are (funny, bad character, annoying, too likable in the show, useless, etc...)

Thanks all, and no, I will NOT discontinue the fic, regardless of the amount of votes I do or don't get. I don't do that. Hell, you saw me updating through exams, I don't do that sort of shit. It's annoying as hell, and I have no respect for people who demand reviews. This is merely a chance to decide who I will bully next *rubs hands together manically* *all the ninja's cowering in pure fear*

Kay, so, I'm going to sleep now, but I will first be posting up the next chapter. What?! You didn't think this week was just going to be an authors note did you!?! You're too used to the cockamamy ways of lame pms-ing authors!! *Grumble*

So… I was just chillin, you know, you know, doing chill like-things, when Narut-

Orochimaru: I JUST WANT TO USE YOUR BODY TO MAINTAIN MY OWN FOR ALL OF ETERNITY OR WHEN I GET BOARD OF SHARINGAN!!

Sasuke: No. You’re just a pervert.

Kakashi: *Reading book*

Naruto: No Teme… your OTHER sensei is a pervert.. this guy is legit only wanting to-

Jiriaya: NARUTO! I can’t believe you’ve lost faith in your perverted Sensei! That’s it! I will have to peek in on Temari in the shower!! *Runs off*

Naruto: *Sigh*

Kakashi: *Giggles*

Me: WHAT DID I SAY LAST TIME ABOUT THAT BOOOOOOK!!!!!!!

Kakashi: *Reading while talking* This is not breakfast Glomp chan.

Naruto: But sensei, didn’t Glomp just say the breakfast TABLE?

Me: NOT TO MENTION YOUR SITTING ON THE TABLE!!!! GET YOUR FAT ASS OFFFFFFFF MY LIBRARYYYYY BOOOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kakashi: It’s a bad place for them to be on the table anyways….

Me: *Flames in eyes*

Meanwhile…. Outside the bathroom door…

Jiriaya: *Creepy rape face* This’ll show Naruto for good… ho ho ho! I’m the best pervert ever Naruto… *Giggles* EH?! *Spazes cause he can’t move*

Shikamaru: Don’t tell me you were about to go peeping… *Sighs* what a drag… why are all of Naruto’s Sensei’s so troublesome…

Hoard of Fan Girls: THAT MEANS YOU LOOOOOOOOOVE TEMARI RIGHT?RIGHT?RIGH?!?

Shikamaru: Eep! *Puts up arms in fear*

Jiraya: *Gets out of jutsu*

Temari: *Oblivious in the shower*

Back to asshole Kakashi and his fat ass….

Kakashi: My fan girls don’t think I’m a fat ass. *Smirks behind mask*

Sasuke: Do YOU have a fan base Glomp?? *Grinning and all bastard smirk faced… and dastardly bastardly… and shit faced…*

Naruto: *Head spinning at definition of Sasuke’s face, mega confused*

Sakura: *Reminded to check to see her Mega upload time limit*

Orochimaru: Um… did you guys forget me?

Sasuke: Shut up. No one loves you… perverted pedophile…

Orochimaru: *Runs off crying*

Kabuto: *Pops up* I love you OROCHIMARUUUUUUUUU!!!

Me: *Twitch twitch* What. Did. I. say. About. Popping. Up. Eh. Kabuto. Question mark.

Kabuto: AAAAAHH!!! IT’S GLOMMPP!!! EEEP!! *Runs off and cries*

Sasuke: And I wanted to go to these losers for TRAINING?

Me: HA! NOW GET YOUR ASS OFF MY BREAKFAST TABLE!!!

Mean-while… spelt mean because soon people will treat Jiriaya DESERVEDLY mean…

Jiriaya: *About to poke in head to bathroom*

Temari: *Oblivious*

Jiriaya: *Turns door handle grinning like the loon he is*

Temari: *Oblivious*

Jiriaya: *Opens door*

Temari: *Grins like the scary ass chick she is and fires a bazooka*

Anko: *Pops up* There ya go! That’s the spirit!!! Jiriaya… GO DIE!!

Timer: *Pops up* (Notice the double meaning… cause timers pop up when they’re done… and in my stories people…. And now objects… pop- OH FORGET IT!! IT’S NOT FUNNY IF I HAVE TO EXPLAIN IT!!!)

Anko: Ooh! My Dango’s ready! *Pops down and cackles all the way through the neighborhood, kicking puppies and shit all the way to her house*

Kiba: *Pops up* That BITCH! *Hugs whimpering Akamaru*

Temari: *Still grinning*

Jiriaya: *Missing an ear, for whatever reason still alive… well, did you SEE the chunin exams? Temari isn’t one for aim… just going so beyond intense with her attaches she blows the entire field apart…. -_-’’’ explanation… right there…*

Gaara and Kankuro: *Pop up*

Jiriaya: *Pales as he realizes why he was kept alive*

Gaara: Urge to kill… rising…

Kankuro: We’re siblings of the girl…. *Says it like that one time where he saves Kiba’s ass and says ‘We’re Shinobi.... allies of the leaf’*

Me: *Stabbing Itachi in rage at having to take exams next year*

Kabuto: *Scared shitless*

Shikamaru:*Still running from fan girls*

Deidara and Tobi: *Randomly running from fan GRILS*

Everyone in general: *Feeling splodie*

Tobi: *Le Gasp!*

Deidara: *Happy face, splodies the house*

Me: Deidara……. WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!! THIS IS MY HOUSE GIVE ME MY BOOKS BACK YOU FEMALE BITCH!! THAT’S RIGHT NOW GET YOUR DAMN CHANGE AND GET THE FUCK OUT!! DON’T LEAVE YOU IDIOT!! HELP ME FIND MY BOOKS THAT YOU DESTROOOOYEDDDDD!!!!! ARAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!! *Goes on rampage*

Deidara and bloody Itachi: *Sneaking away*

Hidan: She’s swearing more than me… TT-TT

So… me and the nins were just chillin when Sakura and Tenten were spazing downstairs.

Naruto: I don’t get it…

Sasuke: For once, I’m with the dobe.

Kakashi: *Looks up from book* What? They agree on something without almost killing each other?? *Le gasp!*

Haku: This is just the top ten sold songs on itunes…. Why are you laughing?

Tenten: Katy Perry is trying to re-live her childhood and her stupid teenage dreams!

Sakura: *Snorts* And Lady Gaga disconnected her telephone and wont take any calls!!!

Tenten: AND JUSTIN BEIBER IS PREGNANT!!!!

Naruto: Eh?

Sasuke: …

Kakashi: Um… *Wasn’t listening, too busy reading his book*

Me: STOP WITH THAT BOOOOOOOOKKKKK!!!!!!

Kiba: …

Sakura: You all must be stupid. Justin Beiber is having a baby.

Kankuro: What’s with girls anyways?

Gaara: What do you mean?

Kankuro: Well, elementary girls all want to be Beibers next wife…

Kiba: …why?

Gaara: I dunno. What’s your point Kiba?

Kankuro: Middle school girls don’t give a damn about the kid.

Shino: Now they know. What’s it’s like. Why? Because I know. Why? Because I am always forgotten.

Kankuro: *Continues on without pause or care, ignoring poor Shino* Then every High school girl wants him dead!!! WTF??

Gaara: …

Kiba: And? What next?

Kankuro: That was the joke dumbass.

Kiba: …

Shino: I got it. I don’t laugh though? Why? Because it wasn’t funny. Why? Because I never laugh.

Kankuro: Oh. You’re here? When did you arrive?

Me: ANYONE SEEN KABUTO!!! I FINALLY WANT TO WHIP HIS ASSSSS!!!

Kabuto: *Cowering in fear under my bed*

Itachi: *Smirk* For once, it’s not ME she wants to kill… *Smiling happily to himself*

Sasuke: *Pops up* That’s right! I finally remember my purpose for living…. And now, for the first time in a fanfic by Glomp, I-I-I, I REMEMBER!!

Naruto: Oh boy.

Sasuke: *Stars in eyes* I WANT MY BROTHER TO DIE!!! *Sparkles fly*

Itachi: Eep!! *Cowers behind Haku*

Naruto: THAT’S RIGHT!!! I remember too!! You almost killed Sasuke teme! He’s my bestfriendforlife!!! I WILL KILL YOU HAKU!!!

Sakura: So much hatred in the ninja world…

Ino: *Pops up* Time to die, bitch!! Sasuke is MINE!! *Cat dives at Sakura*

Sakura: Bring it you whore!! Hell YAH!!! *Stands up all tough and shit*

Kankuro: …

Temari: …

Gaara: What idiots. I’d never do that.

Temari: *Raises eyebrow*

Kankuro: *On ground laughing*

Me: *Running around screaming*

Hidan:*Bursts down my door yelling*

Jiriaya: *Spoils books end to Kakashi*

Kakashi: *Crying*

Everyone: *Fucked up*

Chogi: WAIT!!!

Everyone: *Puts down various knives and blunt objects used as weapons*

Chogi: Exams are over?

Me: *Blink blink*

Sakura and Ino: *Putting down hedge cutters*

Naruto: *Lost his train of thought*

Everyone: Why the hell are we all spazing then!!!

Chogi: Because!! We need to watch howls moving castle and eat copious amounts on junk food!!

Everyone: Oh yeah… YAYYYYYY!!!

And thus, once more, junk food saves the world from sure destruction.

Well, that sure was fun. Now that we’re done trying to kill each other, everything is reasonably back to this odd reality we call ‘normal’. Well, at least, I’m just about to kill Kabuto and blame Itachi like oh so many people blame the drier for their inability to keep track of socks. Daft morons… grumble…

Me: ITACHI!!! WHERE THE HELL DID YOU PUT MY SOCKS!!!!

Kabuto: (Is it safe to come out now?) *whispers in fear*

Shino: You’re gay?

Everyone: ARE YOU JUDGING HIM BASIED ON HOW HE WAS BRN AND HAD NO CHOICE!!!!

Shino: No- uh- ack!! That’s not what I meant-

Everyone: THEN WHAT DIIIIIDDD YOU MEAN!!?!?!!!

Me: *Huggles Kabuto* I’m so sorry, I’ll kill him for you

The Show Closer:
I think it’s a fitting title, considering. They say ‘The show must go on” but if the curtain has closed and act 5 is over, sometimes it’s time to put a dog to rest.

I'll keep this short:

My computer broke shortly after I got back from moping about my friend's move/helping her pack. Without a computer, I can't update. Which totally sucks.

The library blocked this site, and so do our school computers. I've no more web access. I'm currently writing this from another of my friends computers. She's sorta into Naruto, and I've asked her if she'll continue the updates, but there is no certainty of this happening.

It's been a good run guys. I'm sorry that, at least for me (for now) it is over. Steff's updates will be spermatic. She's nice and funny, you'll love her. She said she'll try to keep me posted on the stories progression and on the reviews.

I really can't afford a new computer. No amount of lovely little notes and happy smiles can change that sad fact. I've had a great few (what was it, two years now?) on this site. I love you all.

'Believe it', I appreciated every review I got.

Sincerely- SincereGlomp