Well done. I liked how you portrait Shika's home life and parents. Its pretty interesting. I hope you'll continue the story :)
Hmm, I saw a few grammar mistakes, which surprised me, considering your previous chapters literally had none.
But this chapter was still good. The conversation between Shikamaru and Kiba was hilarious, I loved the dialogue and the thought process included in that scene. It explained a lot about the setting, the events the people face, and the characters themselves.
I'm surprised to see that Shikamaru knows this girl already. I didn't see that coming, but I'm still just as excited to see where this takes off. Keep up the good work with your writing!
Oh dear, Shikamaru seems displeased with the sudden appearance of this Chika. I love this story, it's so well writen and flows so beautifully! You capture Shikamaru so perfectly, and you even threw in that bit about why he lives with his parents. I hope this updates again soon! Merry Christams EnsignIago!
I like how you used the Nara family, as the only one aside from Shikamaru we really know is his father, Shikaku. The manga doesn't show his mother much... I never pictured her so deliberately mean, so I think it's a neat twist in your own plot. This was amazingly written and well worth reading, keep up the wondrous work!
Aww, poor Shikamaru. I really do feel bad for him every time I see his home life. But honestly, that last line really made me laugh. It was priceless.
I really love your writing. Even if your chapters are short, your style is beautiful. You're very descriptive with only a few words. I really appreciate that.
Great job on this! I can't wait for more, keep up the awesome work!
Haha, gotta love it, Shikamaru tortore! He has to be one of my most favorite characters, he's just lazy and awesome:P
The way you described the Nara household is well put, I could really picture this happening! Great job, EnsignIago, keep up the great work!:D
That was hilarious. I love how you portrayed his parents.
I do agree that its short but that doesn't take away from the chapter overall.
I'll be looking forward to the next update! :)
Heh, "what a pain in the ass."
Ha ha, that was amusing. I love Shikamaru's parents, and I wish his mother was in the manga more often. Also, I like your writing style. The way you do paragraphs is unique, but I still enjoyed it. I like how the quotations are centered, I've never read a well written story like that before. Keep up the good work, and update soon please!
Haha, I really like that Shikaku is being so nosy. It's actually really funny just because it's such a realistic type of scene.
Nice job on describing Shikamaru's home life. You did really well with that. Your writing is pretty good, though very short, sadly :( I look forward to more though, keep up the good work!
First, I have to say your name is pretty funny to me because I'm currently reading Othello in English.
Now on to your fanfic. So far it seems good. Not much has happened, but I thought the chapter was pretty funny. I'm not sure if it was meant to be, but I always find Shikamaru's home life humerous. Overall it was a pretty good chapter. Great job, EnsignIago!