Hmm, I know Kakashi Gaiden, but have only read it once a while ago, so I might have forgotten some names - but mostly I think it's your OCs. However, now that I've read the second chapter and gone back the first chapter makes a lot more sense. For example, I've worked out who Minato (or Arashi?) and Sakumo are - should I have known that from KGaiden? Presumably the third chapter will help with building up the picture further too. And I like the OCs as characters, and their kekkei genkai, so that's no problem. It's just working out who is who! Oh, and Kaida's father isn't there, is he? I wonder what happened to him...

However, I do agree to some extent with DarkMS, that the conversations can be confusing. I wouldn't swap them for description though (personally I think description is usually the boring bit in writing), the dialogue is the most interesting, and the best element of your stories. Perhaps just make it a little clearer who is speaking sometimes, because when we don't know the characters that well yet it's very hard to guess! Of course, that makes the story more challenging to read, which I kind of like, but it is harder. So it depends how accessible you want the story to be...

And I knew Kaida sounded familiar, so I went way back to Kyoudai - I like the new version a lot by the way (I think it's new from when I last read it). I really hope you continue that too, if you feel there is more to write in it. It fills the hole in canon pretty well already, but maybe that was just the background for a story about adult Kaida and Naruto? I hope so..! I like the links between the stories anyway.

niveaus

Author's Response: hey thanks and sorry, i should put something in the note about where it's coming from. as for the third chapter, it's gonna be alot more ditl for these two; and no kaida's father is not there and you'll find out why later - 2, maybe 3 chappies.rnrni have this nasty habit of forgetting the reader sometimes when i'm writing. i'll keep that in mind with the rest.rnrnthanks for the reread of Kyoudai, and yes it's been editted. the edit's most of the reason i started this, once i straightened out kaida's story the rest of her life kept coming to me. there's ideas for a possible trilogy here... ^-^

Your stories always make me think, and these two new entries are no exception - partly because of all the characters that I'm not familiar with. But I like the way you drop us into the middle of a world that we have to piece together as the story progresses. And I think a story about Kakashi's childhood is an excellent idea! Enjoyed the Kyuubi/Naruto fic you posted just before too.

Author's Response: i'm glad they do, don't get me wrong i love a good WAFF or PWP, but if it's gonna be multi-chappies there's got to be more(i usually work the things i don't understand/aren't covered in canon). i just don't like those fics that take 2 or 3 chaps explaining things before you actually get the story.rnrnbtw, which charas are you talking about? you do know about kakashi gaiden, right? or are you talking about my OCs'?rnrnthanks for the boost, i'm working on the next chap for this one now, and have ch.2 for CHaS ready to go.