-Tell them Gaara is emo, goth, ect..
*There's a way to get hit hard in the face

--Say that Gaara wears eyeliner
*Its called Insomnia!

---Claim Shukaku is a cat
*Raccoon! Raccoon! Not a fuffy kitty! That's his brother

----Tell them he secretly loves his father
*To say this you must be on drugs

-----Tell them sand castles are for little kids
*You will find yourself stuck in a sand pit for saying this, I have done it to people

-----Start singing 'Mr. Sandman'
*Prepare to be clawed to death and or gagged

----Say that Gaara is endangered like other pandas
*I wouldn't test it out, things won't be pretty

---Tell them Kishimoto plans on killing him by suicide cause he's too emo
*Now you just want to be hit by a screaming fan

--Ask them what they think that third eye is REALLY for
*Actually....thats a way to make fangirls go squee...

-Tell them about all the LeeGaa fics out there
*Aww come on man are you trying to blind us here?

-Tell them all about how Sasuke is '"more special"' than Naruto
*Just to tell you, my friend hits hard..*annoyed look*

--Speak of how he deserves to die
*Purses made marks on me for saying this

---Tell them he won a ninja award, Teme of the Year
*Haha, word of advice, run very far

----Dis the fan, call it a Pokeball
*Hide under chairs...it still won't be safe

-----Call Sasuke gay, or just go SasGAY
*Haha plug your ears you are in for a yelling at

-----Tell them to write his name then circle the last three letters
*Dude you are on your own, I had to hide for a week from Ali

----Tell them why Orochimaru REALLY wants his...body
*This actually makes some fans happy...o.O

---Tell them his hair stlye was taken from a picture in Bird Monthly
*Laugh as you run kid laugh as you run

--Claim that the Chidori is really his summoning jutsu to call his bird brotheren
*Seriously, just laugh an run it will not be safe for long

-Say that weasels are better and can kill a bird just by poking its head
*Hehe Sasuke fans may hate you but Itachi ones go Squee!

-Tell them how he has a thing for little boys
*Oh come on! Kimimaru, Itachi (which failed) and then Sasuke!

--Say that weasles are the creators of all and snakes are just jealous
*Itachi is just better ...*cowers*

---Tell them Orochimaru is Michael Jackson's twin brother seperated at birth
*Hehehe I didn't say son, I mean really who would want to have a kid with MJ?

----Tell them Manda finally got snippy and decided to eat him
*Haha we all know that snake has issues ^_^

-----Share with them stories of when he and Jiraiya were kids
*You know you have to be curious about their...adventures *shifty eyes*

-----Ask them if they know what his tounge is really for
*...Kabuto probably knows... ...*starts running*

----Tell them Orochimaru has starred in some of Jiraiya's books
*God, say this face to face I advise you to run, very fast

---Tell them Uchihas are stronger than he is and he is a jealous little man
*Why else has he targeted the Uchiha Bros? Other motives..?

--Tell them Orochimaru doesn't rule a village, no he rules a mansion
*Hahaha see see? Hes not that great he doesn't even get two buildings in his 'village'

-Announce the real reason he left Akatsuki, Deidara called him a girl so he cried and left
*Ok seriously the only thing to do here is run and hope the bullets miss

-Call Deidara a girl
*You're just asking for it

--Tell them he is really Ino in disguise
*Run my friend run

---Tell them his little hand mouth is just a stubborn sharpie marker
*Ooo I advise that your next option is running

----Mention what his little mouths are really used for
*Ok so this could make some go squee..

-----Tell them he sings 'Man I Feel Like A Women' in the shower
*Yikes dude, you may want to run reallly far for that one

-----Tell them his art is horrible
*...Buddy just don't stop running

----Say that he only goes 'un' and 'yeah' because hes an idiot
*Calling Deidara an idiot will get you maimed

---Say that Tobi is better than Deidara
*You're on your own

--Show them a Tobi x Deidara pairing
*Oh gods man! You have a death wish?

-Ask if they know what he isn't wearing under that cloak
*Haha some may go 'omg you perv' and attack, others may die of loss of blood

-Tell them Itachi loves his little brother
*Known fact: Itachi fans hate Sasuke...therefore..you die

--Tell them he paints his nails 'cause it makes him feel pretty
*It's an Akatsuki thing! He can't help that!

---Tell them he has a thing for fish
*...*one two three clicks of a gun* I think you should start moving now...

----Say that Malfoy makes a better weasel
**glares* Ok first he was a ferret and Itachi could kill him by literally blinking his eyes

-----Call Itachi blind
*More like start calling 911 ...you will need it

-----Ask them if they know what Itachi really did in those seventy two hours with Kakashi
*...Once again this is one of those depends on who you speak with type of things...

----Say that Sasuke will get his revenge one day
*Then say good bye cruel world cause you will most certainly die...horribly die

---Ask them if they know about his friend, Mr Snuggles
*Oh you did NOT just bring up the teddy bear

--Tell them the Sharingan are just contacts he got on ebay
*Run from the missles kid cause we will hunt you down for dissing the Sharingan

-Ask them to tell you the REAL reason Sasuke wants revenge
*Run. You won't make it to see sunrise kid

-Call him a girl
*Prepare for a beating my friend

--Call him blind
*Ouch...I would suggest running

---Tell them to go shoot a bird
*The whole 'Caged Bird' seal thing, yeah this won't blow over well

----Say Sharingan pwns Byakuugan
*They will be armed with weaponry...head for the hills

-----Tell them Neji should try out for the part of Helen Keller in a play
*Now would you like a black or white coffin?

-----Mention how great the Main House is
*Black eye or two coming your way

----Tell them Neji has a thing for Hinata
*Hopefully, most fans will beat you to death for incest

---Ask what the Byakuugan is really for
*Again one of those depends on the person kinda things here

--Then tell them he helps Ero-Sennin write his novels
*Depends on how you use that phrase, spying or as a character 'cause the second will get you maimed

-Say that he is a Nazi in disguise
*So, I see you don't have a bright future a head of you here

-Mention how he looks like a walking traffic cone
*Come on people he's a ninja in neon orange

--Tell them he abuses the right to be a blonde
*...You can't deny it ok, the kid didn't even know what chakra was after graduation

---Say ramen has disappeared thus Naruto shall starve
*....I actually have no idea what they may do, but they will be pissed

----Mention what a special ninja he is
*They will hit you with a snappy come back such as 'Oh yeah? Well Sasuke's more special' Cat fight may ensue...

-----Ask them if they know what really happened over the time skip
*Near three years alone...with Jiraiya....gives you thoughts that will scare anyone, yaoi fans or not. Either way you will not be walking home

-----Say raccoons are better than foxes
*As a Gaara fan I must say this because it is fact....Just don't attack me please

----Mention how he is king of tadpoles and inept frogs
*He always summons the useless ones! Its a fact! He summoned Gamba twice...ooo scary

---Tell them he looks like he has rabies when he goes into Kyuubi mode
*Anyone who says that must be hurt for it alright? No one disses Kyuubi

--Ask them to tell you the real reason he learned Sexy no Jutsu
*A phrase of multiple meanings depending on how hard you think, but I would suggest anything from dodging fists to dodging cars...

-If they don't believe any of this run up and scream 'Believe It!'
*You will get hit upside your head for being a baka

-Ask why he has caterpillers on his face
*You will be hit in the face and you may be able to see again in a week

--Tell them he shall never be a splendid ninja
*They will be angry and you may be unconscious

---Make fun of the sparkles of youth
*Gut meet shoe, shoe meet gut for you will be kicked and or punched violently

----Tell them to make Lee return Gaara's eyebrows
*You may be able to get a giggle but it is highly unlikely, most likely you will get a fist in your face

-----Question why he looks like Elmo
*In my defense here, look at their eyes, they are so similar it's scary

-----Throw sand at them and say Lee can't beat sand
*So what hospital will you be checking into?

----Point at a caterpiller and scream 'Omg! Lee's eyebrows ran away!'
*Don't worry the bleeding will stop...eventually

---Say he ran away with Gai into the sunset of youth
*It's true and everyone will agree though some will be pissed and may try to push you down a flight of stairs

--Ponder how he gets out of the green spandex onesie
*Seriously! Someone has to have pondered this once! They will be ready to punch you and stop half way when they start pondering it too

-Tell them that he copied Sasuke and Naruto's styles in the preliminaries
*Duck, run, hide, nothing will work for they will come after you wielding heavy machinery

-Tell them he is a Pokemon
*You had to have seen that one coming, but those saying this may want to buy some earplugs

--Say he is a Yu-Gi-Oh master
*I'm sorry but the guy has his own deck of cards to carry around. Keep those earplugs and maybe duck once or twice

---Just call him a traitor
*It may be true but fans will kick and scream and procede to tell you why Sound is better than Leaf

----Say that Kabuto is stupid
*He didn't fail seven times 'cause he was an idoit ok? He was just evil and fans will make sure you know this

-----Mention how he plays doctor with Orochimaru
*You will get maimed depending on whether or not you speak to a yaoi fan

-----Call Kabuto an old man
*Just cause he's got silver hair, glasses, and slightly deaf doesn't mean he's an old man. Fans will procede on beating you to a bulb after telling you this

----Call him a pedophile in training
*Works under Orochimaru, what else do you expect? Also expect to be hit hard and fast

---Tell them of his newest jutsu 'Suck Up no Jutsu'
*I mean really! This kid just knows how to suck up and play Mr Goody Two Shoes to everyone!

--Mention how he is another one of Orochimaru's boy toys
*They will get pissed, no one wants their idol to be considered a boy toy. Duck the chairs 'cause they will be thrown

-Say something about how he is a male nurse
*I said something similiar to a friend who likes Kabuto and she freakin hit me with a text book...one of those huge ones that have pages in the thousands

-Just say 'Billboard Brow'
*Hehehehe good ol' Ino

--Say her and Ino are 'friends with benifits'
*Ewwwww ewwww ewwww someone burn the mental image! Yeah some may like it but then again...eyes may bleed...

---Say Sakura is a worse ninja than....a ninja
*Seriosuly...anyone can beat this chick

----Mention something about a sex change
*On the subject of her being a chick...are we intirely sure about that?

-----Aim the words 'fat' 'hag' etc etc at her
*It's the truth and I don't mean Sai's version!

-----Tell them her one and only love is Lee for Sasuke is a teme
*Hehe getting two pitiful fandoms in one insult

----Name her the 'Pink B*tch Wonder'
*Haha a personal favorite of mine. Had to censor it though *snaps fingers*

---Say that Haku is cuter
*Hahaha ok look at this reasoning people! Sakura=girl Haku=boy YET if you put them in a dress....Haku wins

--Spill some pink paint and go "Omg! Sakura's bleeding! We have to hel- wait..who cares?"
*Heheheheh If I ever meet a Sakura fan (they are an endangered species) I will have to do that and record the results

-Point at a picture of it (yes Sakura is an it) and go "Good God! It's a mutant cherry blossom!"
*I have nooo idea where that came from but just imagine the responces...

-Call him 'mut' 'dog breath' etc etc
*Prepare to defend your fandom for attacks will come

--Point out Kiba's favorite hydrent on a casual walk
**giggles* -ahem- You will get kicked and possibly pushed into said hydrent

---The red triangles...ask if he's attempting to be emo with the makeup
**looks up from book* I see you want a room in the I.C.U

----Call him a cheap imitation of InuYasha and Sesshomaru
*Its true! His name and the fact he can go all *gir* and turn into a big white wolf! But ya will get hit unless they are a fan of Sesshy and Inu more

-----Question the parka...Bad hair day?
*Dude you will get smacked and then have a pic of him minus the parka hood shoved in your face

-----Ask if Kiba does EVERYTHING like a dog
*First see if they are smarter then Kiba, if yes dodge the chair

----Call Kiba anything from 'baka' to 'dobe'
*You have to admit the kid is a bit slow, seriosuly he hangs out with Naruto..what do you expect a Shika?

---Go on about he couldn't beat the Sakon-Ukon bother..thing
*Seriously who loses to pretty boys? Don't even mention his defeat by Naruto...hahahah just just run. There will be no hope

--Ponder the eternal question, does he get fleas?
*If he were to piss of Shino major possibilities but none the less you should avoid a fist

-Ask if he has a thing for animals
*NOT THAT WAY *hides* I mean all his friends are named after animals of some sort or control them/possesed by them, but a fan will not think that hard and will hit you...with their car

-Use his terms and call him sexy
*Hehehe run buddy run for your life

--Now call them sexy
*Just...just don't stop running

---Say his art his lifeless
*You will be dodging wrenches

----Call him a Sasuke wanna be
*Hmm should we start the count down to your death now or give you a three second head start?

-----Call him a second rate artisit
*You're pushing you luck child...run for it

-----Draw an animal on a peice of paper, throw it at them and then say "Sai ain't got them skills"
*Now your death certificate...what parchment would you like?

----Tell them Sai was taken to the zoo
**giggles* Cause of all his animals hehe *looks at people* ahem I mean they will bite you

---Say Deidara's birds pwn his
*Time for a good old fashion b*tch slapping

--Call him a flat out emotionless teme
*Though it is true they will beat you with stuff

-Mention how Sai was taken away to the crazy house because he wanted to draw up more friends to eat people
*I have to clap myself on the back for this one 'cause it made my day BUT fans will not agree and will come after you wielding torches, pitchforks and angry mobs

-Say Shukaku is best
**stands up and proud* It's a fact you will all have to live with

--Threaten to send Kyu to the zoo
*Come on, you know you wanna put him in a zoo and watch the people scream in pain and....I'm sorry lil off topic hehe...fans will be angry *nervous giggle*

---Call Kyu an escaped Vulpix
*Even I'll get twitchy people! He has NINE tails Vulpix has SIX if you wanna make him a Pokemon dont you thing NINETAILS would be better?

----Go on about how Kyuubi should have been taken rather than Shukaku
*It's the truth god damn it! I liked Shukaku! But meh fans will go 'Oh no you didn't' and try to stab you

-----Mention how he is just a big rabid dog
*Prepare to be run over...more than once

-----Say raccoons pwn foxes any day
*Once again it's true! Them and pandas pwn foxes though fans will hiss and spit and go all rabbies on you

----Call him weak for being sealed within Naruto
*You will be hit with a book and then go deaf listening to why Naruto is an awsome jinchuriki

---Call him a pitiful excuse for being the great Nine Tailed Demon
*Well he was sealed away into a baby, how hard is it to take over a baby, seal or no seal? Shukaku...now he was able to get control...*huggles Gaara and hides*

--Tell them to go to the zoo to go 'rescue' him 'cause Naruto wanted him gone
*Doesn't that sound like a fun day trip? And on the way they will be sure to push you out of the speeding car

-Say that Sesshomaru makes a better demon hound even with only three legs, he's not sealed in a blonde idiot after all
*Once again it's true! Sesshy kicks ass and forever will..Except Inu's hehe....But Kyu fans...will beat you with a stick

-Call Hinata blind
*Prepared to be punched

--Say she looks possesed
*Ok I didn't make this up! My friend did! And if you want to get back at her....I will tell you she is a Sasuke fan

---Mention about her being a perv
*Why else would she have crushed on Naruto instead of Sasuke...?

----Dub her a pretty ballerina
*Meh...if it's a guy your talking to you may have just enough time to run before they wake up from blood loss

-----Ponder if she ever gets amnesia
*She falls ALL the time! You gotta wonder about this...

-----Show them a NejiHina fic...or doujin
*Depends on the person but pray to god that everyone will beat the shit out of you for lack of morals..

----Call her slow
**growls* Even I will beat you for this one, no one should agree with temes like Hiashi!

---Poke fun at the Main House
*Get it? Poke! Hehe, well if they are also Neji fans you shall survive, if not..Nice knowing you

--Stab a fox
*First off, PETA wiil get you in prison for that..second the fan will stab you while in prison (which may suck if you're a Neji fan and the whole beating a caged bird thing...)

-Push them in front of their crush and either...(a) Call them Hinata when the stutter and blush (b) If nothing happens scream 'WTF?! I thought you wanted to be like Hinata! Faint god damn it! Faint!'
*Dude you and I may find this hilarious, but they won't. So...should I be on look out for the ambulence or the coroners?

-Ponder scary possibilities for what lies under the mask
*Yeah, a rip off of episode 101 but you know, some of the things us psychos come up with can get our heads bashed into walls...*nods*

--Pat them on the back and tell him he is not a perv
*Most Kakashi fans actually take offense to this...they like his pervy ways

---Ask what really happened when he was trapped with Itachi for 72 hours
*Hehe again one of my fave kinds, that depends on who you attack...

----Call him an Uchiha poser
*You will be beat to a pulp by Sasuke-hating-Kakshi-lovers. Who wants their fave compared with a teme?

-----Point at a scarecrow and and shout 'OMG! They tied up Kakashi!'
**giggles* Kinda depends on who you talk to...they may run up to it and go 'Kashi!' and then be really pissed

-----Throw dolphins at them
*Haha if you don't get this then I think you should go visit a dolphin at his work place

----Say that Gai pwns him
*Teme. You will be bashed into the sidewalk

---Tell them about some of Gai's 'challenges'
**eye bleed* Dear god people! Have some mercy! For that I will join the angry mob built in your honor

--Call him stupid
*Dude...he reads the SAME book throughout the entire manga/anime!

-Call him a pimp
*He summons dogs at will...and another word for a girl dog is what people?

-Call him stupid, plain and simple, just like him
*He's a genius b*itch! Get over yourself as they run you over

--Keep saying troublesome
*Ahh, good way to get hit in face with flying books

---Hit them with Shogi or Go pieces
*Fun games, though I do suck. They will be shoved down your throat in hopes you will choke and die *nods*

----Ask if they will perform the Shika Shake
*Hehe, if they don't get it, you're a lucky teme

-----Ponder aloud about what really happened in the earth dome thing
*You know they must have censored something...-meep- *runs under bush*

-----While driving and spying a roadkill deer cry out 'Oh noes! Shika died!'
*Haha! I did this! And I was nearly pushed out the car by Dani xD

----Question his uses of his kages
*Hmm...may make some go squee

---Call him a pimp
*How many times has this guy had to fight a chick? I mean really...Ino, Temari, Kin, Tayuya...who will he be paired with next?

--Dis the ponytail
*Haha they will rip your hair out just to say 'Least he has hair'

-Call his kages a cheap version of a kakai genkai
*It's his family's skill...but NOT a bloodline trait. Psht, they just want to be special

-Call him Bug Boy
*Hehe if it's not already the fangirl's nickname for him I suggest running

--Ask if he has a face
*You have to understand, I mean do we ever see his whole face? No not really, nah

---Call him the new actor for Cyclops in X-Men
**glare* Shino pwns Cyclops ok? His shades are like 10x cooler *nods*

----Just dis the 'fro
*You are asking to get a black eye

-----Wake them up at the crack of dawn and make them sleep at night fall
*They may love Shino, but they won't love his schedule. Prepare to be tied to a ceiling or wall (maybe a busy interstate highway..) by duct tape

-----Throw bugs at them over and over and over...
*If they freak with bugs, you will die and may be forced to eat them

----Tie them up and force them to watch the move 'Bug's Life'
*Well, once they chew threw restraints you will be nearly drowned in a form of water..possibly a cup or something *shrugs*

---Hit them with bamboo
*Shino translates to bamboo for all you inept out there. So they will probably grab it and hit you with it, ya.

--Yell at them because Kiba's got fleas
*You'll just be hit for being a baka

-Call him a stalker-perv
*Come on, you cannot honestly say he doesn't look like one of those streetside stalkers. Plus..what kinds of info can his lil creepy crawlies give him?

-Say that he is not Obito
*He is Obito damn it! We will laugh in your faces when he admits it! But for now we will settle on slamming your head into a wall

--Say he only wears the mask because he is hideous
*You call Obito hideous? You teme! You will be mugged and left in some alley in New York...

---Dis the pairing of DeiTo
*That is just about one of the cutest pairings (not ToDei that's scary) We shall beat you with pipes and bats

----Call him a cyclops
*Buddy you better run before that angry mob of mine shows up...

-----Get a pinwheel (orange and black) and say this is what Tobi's clone's look like
*And then enjoy that pinwheel hitting you in the face...

-----Tell them how Zetsu really trained him
*Dear god the horror! The mental images! Shield the children! That is beyond horrifing people and for thinking that you should die...horribly die

----Tell them Tobi will never live to see the end of the series, curtesy of other Akatsuki
*You will mostly likely be hit with a witty come back like 'Well you will never live to see the end of today' and then be punched senseless

---Call Tobi a good boy
*'Cause it's true

--Call Tobi a good boy
*'Cause it's true

-Call Tobi a bad boy
*..*strangles Tobi* I love the lil guy but damn, why must fictional characters take over my computer?! Fans will strangle you for this by the way unless it is another fan saying it for they always have good reasons *looks at Tobi*

-Say he is what little Lees are made from
*I apoligize for that little Powerpuff moment..school thing don't ask. Anyways -ahem- fans will beat you to pieces

--Mention how Kakashi always wins
*The fans may beat you up and if they think deeper into that phrase you will most likely be meeting the blunt end of a bat

---Tell them his portable sunset got lost and will never return, the anime gods have blessed us
*Ouch, so how do you plan on removing that chair from you skull?

----Say dogs are so much cooler than turtles
*Even though I own both dogs and turtles *huggles Pepper & Sparky* My doggies pawn. But fans will growl and hiss and spit and rampage

-----Ask them if he is colorblind or something
*I mean really, colorblind people can't see green, he may think he is wearing grey or something. Fans will still not like that answer so prepare to meet the floor, head on

-----Insult them while in the good guy pose
*Is that the angry mob I hear approaching?

----Hand them a tweezer and say 'Pass this along to Gai for me pal'
*I honestly do not know what will happen, but I do know you won't be seen around town for awhile...

---Mention his relationship with Lee
*Some will claw your eyes out and others will nod and tell you to catch up with the times

--Say he shall not be returning to the series because running into the sun finally got to him
*Where do you want us to send the flowers?

-Say he stole an Oompa Loompa's onsie idea
*They will begin to sing 'Oompa doompa duppity doop I've got a bullet just for you'

-Take them to the aquairium and tell them Kisame was captured
*You may be pushed into the shark tank... good going

--When you don't find him at the aquairium treat them to dinner... at a sushi place
*So you weren't pushed into the tank? Maybe you'll be pushed onto the stove table top...

---Tell them Kisame has been in a few of Itachi's worlds himself
*Now is your friend a yaoi fan? The eternal question...

----Get them to repeat after you 'Fish are friends, not food'
**giggles* Gotta love that one but fans will look at you with scary eyes before they go all shark on you

-----Just keep playing the theme song to Jaws over and over agian
*Dodge my friend...dodge

-----Then tell them Kisame got his first big job as playing Jaws' stunt double
*...Really have no clue what may happen but they won't be pleased...

----Ask what Samehada can really be used for
*Perv and run my friend perv and run for if they catch you...well it was nice knowing you

---Tell them Zabuza is definately a better swordsman
*Zabuza is definately more fun....but alas he died first so they won't be pleased

--Refer to him as 'Sushi' or 'Fishstick-chan' or 'Mermaid'
**giggles* Unless that's already their nickname for him I suggest hiding under a rock

-Tell them he dies because he forgot he needs to live in water
*Seriously did anyone but me forget he's a freakin fish out of water?

-Call him a cat
*And get hit by a bat

--Say any kitsune could kick a tanuki's ass
*Prepare for a kick in your ass for that one

---Point to a raccoon on the the side of the road and scream 'Oh noes! Shukaku died!'
**cracks knuckles* Want to repeat that? Cause I don't think your life will last that long

----Mention how pandas are on the verge of extinction
*Hmm..It says in my book you're on the verge of extinction as well...coincidence?

-----Start throwing sand around and say you are Shukaku's new jinchuriki
*B*itch! You did not say that 'cause if anyone gets to be his jinchuriki it's me! *grabs guns*

-----Call him pitiful for being sealed away by Akatsuki
*You'll wish you were sealed away, angry mobs will be at your doorstep

----Say Kyuubi is better than Shukaku for eight more reasons
*So Shukaku only has one tail, but you will only have one eye so it may work nicely

---Call him an armadillo
*I've heard this before and I'll tell you the exact outcome in three weeks when that person returns from the hospital

--Decided to speak Sai and call Shukaku 'huggable', 'cute', 'adorable', 'kind' etc etc...
*Prepare to be mauled by rabid anim...I mean fans...we don't have rabid animals or nothing....*whistles*

-Take them to the desert and leave them there saying you won't bring them back until they find the statue Shukaku is sealed in
*You will be hit with a vase for the meaning of the statue hunt and you will be killed via poisonous snake for abandoning them in the desert

-Call her a dumb blonde
*She's a lil genius and for that you will have to dodge flying chairs...no they don't have wings ya moron

--Insult her for loosing to a lazy ass ninja
*If they are also Shika fans you will die horribly. *looks at book* Hmm...death at 3:15 good with you?

---Then complain about her rescuing him and killing Tayuya
*Tayuya didn't need to die damn it! They will try to kick and punch you, call me and I'll bite them *raises hand*

----Say she hates her family
*She wuvs her family you heartless jack ass who will find rocks thrown through your windows

-----Make a paper fan and start hitting them with it
*Then prepare to get hit upside your head with a rather heavy book

-----Then draw moons on it and say you suceeded in stealing her fan
*Then dig a hole and say you suceeded in digging your own grave

----Dis the hair that defies the natrual laws of gravity
*We like her hair its fun and poofy this way *pokes* You may get hit by like an incoming spike so I'd watch out if I were you

---Say that Alladin's magic carpet beats her fan any day
*They will slap you silly and call you a retarded moron

--Say she can summon Itachi any time
*'Cause she summons weasels! *giggles* Well Tem fans may not kill ya but Ita ones will

-Call her high maitence
*Seriously it must take a lot to keep her hair like that...Anyways fans will eat you..seriously they will start grabbing knives and shit

-Simply refer to him as Bat Boy
**giggles* They will growl and hiss and spit and procede to hide your body in the river

--Say he escaped to the circus to be a make up artist
*I see little flames dancing around them..maybe you should run and join the circus before they find you

---Mention just who is his favorite evil puppet and why
*This is one of those depends who you ask kind of things. Also one of those, test your friend's thought process. I won't tell you what I mean but some fans may love you and others will poison you...get it now?

----Ponder what his chakra strings can be used for
*Ok most all fans will fall over dead...you consequence? Explaining why your friend is now dead in a pool of their own blood

-----Call him chubby
*You're asking for it. Those fans will murder you along with theirChouji Fandom friends

-----Say he is a walking bilboard for Visa
*Look at his shirt/onesie-thing! It looks like a Visa card! Fans may take time to think of that before they smack you

----Pick up a puppet and fling it around
*They will snatch it from you, glare and then tackle you dead

---Just say the word 'dolls'
*They will actually try to gnaw your arm off.... run child... run

--Ask what he can do with those puppets
*Warnign, this may make fans fall over and die due to lack of oxygen and blood. Those left standing may either pat you on the back or hit you upside the head

-Now for girl fans only, ask them if Kankurou does theit make up
**snickers* Insult the fan and the character, two for one, nice. But you will probably have you face meet the pavement...a lot.

-Call him a girl
*All will hiss and spit and the yaoi fans will kill for ruining the ZabuxHaku moments

--Say that Sakura is prettier and all around better
*Ok...what are you on? Crack? Speed? What? Seriosuly....people will come after you

---Get an uber adorable Haku plushie and put it in a freezer before giving it to the fan laughing like a mad person
*How dare you do that to Haku! *mauls arm* Yes fans will maul you and then shove you into a freezer...at the city morgue

----Say he is Zabuza's b*tch
*A few will stab you and others will say duh you loser catch up with the times. Seriously it's what Kishimoto wanted

-----Send them picture's of Haku wearing a pretty pink dress
*They will then tell you to stop taking screen shots from the series genius

-----Remember the Haku plushie? Tell them Barbie is better
*Least you don't have to by Haku's friends like that blonde b*tch

----Say Haku went to hell
**growls* If Haku went to hell you're getting out of this alive..oh dang looks like you aren't walking home tonight

---Say that Haku failed Zabuza by dying
**eye twitch* No one says Haku failed Zabuza...No One. We fans will all come to your house and beat sense into your empty head

--Get ice cubes and make a trail and say Haku went that way
*Just what the hell? You will be slapped and then have ice cubes in your shirt...or pants...*evil laugh*

-Call Haku Sasuke's Ice Princess
**cracks knuckles* You just have a death sentence or something pal? Honestly we will kill you dead with books for saying that