It had started when I was six. The first day of the academy....before I'd watched all of the other older children walk by towards the academy from my haven, the loft window seat-the one nobody even knew about until much later-and yearned to be one of them...a BIG kid. Now I was SO near to being one I could almost feel those big books beckoning to me.
I would be the coolest girl in the class of 6-year-olds and all the boys and girls would want to be ME!
I shoved my long bangs back from my face...so far...I was the only girl with bangs in the class. How cool! They were a little long though, half of my vision was covered in pink, soft hair. I brushed them over a bit, my forehead barely showing. I walked pat a group of boys. They were 9 or 10...BIG kids! I tried to straighten and walk perfectly straight, yet as I did i heard, right as I passed them the hissed words.
"theres a new billboard in town.....ON YOUR HEAD BILLBOARD BROW!!!" shocked, I turned and stared at them and they snickered. It felt like someone had hit me in the chest with the butt of a kunai. One feeling generated in my small 6-year-old mind: fear.
I clutched my mothers hand. "Is something wrong, Sakura-chan?" she asked softly. I just stood and felt intense ice spreading through me....it stretched all the wway up to my fingertips and I half expected it to burst out and snag my mothers hand in an icy cage. I pulled away at the thought. The cold was still there, I was shaking like I was about to cry.
I was nothing...nothing...nothing.....I'm not important......nobody likes ME....everyone..hates...me! I felt burning in my chest, not heartburn, like when you eat too much, but a fiery heat that ached and retched around. ANd in that one instant....three things about me changed.
1. My favorite color was now pink
2. I adored ponies
3. I was in love with a boy named Sasuke Uchiha.
These are all lies, all of them. Never determine those three are even loosely related to me....my now self. I was different now....
This is me....



if you don't understand go shove your face in a wall somewhere....
(I'm talking to you Mr.@#%^chiwa a.k.a "Sasuke-kun")

Day one of new self

i woke up this morning and felt incredibly sick. My stomach felt like exploding up out of my stomach so I rolled over and let it. It landed on the floor with a sickening splat. I lay there half off the bed staring at it. It was pink with splotches of black. I don't know why I was so drawn to it.
it wasn't pretty at all...but...wait...of course it wasn't, ugly things..they're meant to be stared at....no they aren't they're for to tll us beauty isn't necessary...no they aren't...stop staring at my own gross puke...don't say GROSS its so girly, say something the 5-year-old un-ALTERED you owuld have said, like putrid, or pungent!
"SHUT UP D&%^ SAKURA!!!" I realised you had said that aloud, those words HAD come out of your mouth...along with another half gallon of pink crap.
It was weird, but I felt absolutely fine. I got up and swept the barf with my left foot and a towel, as I brushe my hair up into a funky messy bun. I did NOT know what the freak I was doing, wait...yes I did...its what Sakura(unaltered version) had done...and her name was "Saku"
Smexy and short.....I wore the clothes that I NEVER did. A netted top with a brown overcoat, ripped mid lower arm, and jeans with high black leather boots.
I looked in the mirror..:"crap, forgot my headband" . I hastily tied it around my belt loop exposing my collarbone...hey..I thought they looked appealing.
WIth that I left ot go hang with..someone. Maybe TenTen? The Chuunin examiners had left a WHILE ago, so I didn't have to worry about them.
the sun felt cool and the autumn was breezy. I was eating a piece of french toast covered in mustard. It sounded grosss..but its what I Liked not that Prep princess weakling from the past 6 years. I shuddered and ran down the street. The ichiraku shop was to the left...I'd never seen Naruto this early. It'd be cool to surprise him a bit...
I swung into the ramen shop, hair only a hott pink flash. Naruto ws sitting slurping ramen with his eyes closed. Yum..ramen. I ordered a bowl and slammed my butt down in the seat beside him. He looked up blearily.
"oh...hi Sakura..." he said, yawning.
"Hi!" I said and ordered a small bowl of ramen.
he did a double take as I ordered.
"SAKURA!!!???? WHAT HAPPENED TO-" I clapped a hand over his mouth. "Oh shush up," I giggled. "I just was feeling like myself today!"
Naruto squinted one eye at me and hopped up on the chair bobbling backa nd forth like a jack-in the box.
"Sakura...you aren't acting like yourself!" he said, an obvious statement only Naruto could say without looking dumb..or...dumber than usual I guess.
"Its Saku now....not Saku-ra...just Saku." I said as my ramen landed in front of me with a clang. I took a manly gulp.
"COOL! SAKU AND" he wiggled his eyebrows, barely visible under the headband. "NARU..." it was a suggestive comment. You raised an eyebrow at him. "i'm not into Sasuke anymore..' oyu watched as his mouth hit the ground in a shocked anime drop..."but I'm definitely not myself enough to be into you!!!!"
Naruto cocked an eyebrow. God, did this kid understand ANYHTHING?
You ditched him and dumped your remaining ramen ion the bushes. A few homeless Konoha children ran to get it ad hoved it in their mouthes. or what they could get of it nyeay. You furrowed your brow and walked on quickly with oyur head bent...
You heard Kiba before you saw him. He was walking with Sasuke (?) and making a balancing act of poor Akamaru. He saw you and raised his eyebrow.
"DANG ,girl," he said loudly. "you look GOOD!" his eyes were mainly n your tight fishnet thing...you kind of wished you didn'td ress so bravely today. Sasuke looked slightly surprised and swallowed.
"Sakura?" he said. Your whole world froze...."what to do? what to do?" you asked yourself wildly.
"Its Saku. ' you said finally, with a cold edge to your voice.
"I LIKE it." said Kiba, "say...what are yo ding Fri-" Sasuke lockedeyes wit me and I could see him searching you for...who cares what!!! He was an emo piece of crap who treated you worse than he treated his slit wrists.
Yous tormed away. WHy Sasuke? WHY? Hes an idiot....isn't he?